THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BRIDE

Winter Page 1 of 13 January 10 Lesson 6 THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BRIDE DEVOTIONAL READING: John 10:7-15 BACKGROUND SCRIPTURE: John 10:1-11; Song of Songs...
Author: Todd Gibbs
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January 10 Lesson 6

THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BRIDE DEVOTIONAL READING: John 10:7-15 BACKGROUND SCRIPTURE: John 10:1-11; Song of Songs

SONG OF SONGS 6:4-12 You are as beautiful as Tirzah, my darling, as lovely as Jerusalem, as majestic as troops with banners. 5 Turn your eyes from me; they overwhelm me. Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from Gilead. 6 Your teeth are like a flock of sheep coming up from the washing. Each has its twin, not one of them is missing. 7 Your temples behind your veil are like the halves of a Photo: Jupiterimages / liquidlibrary / Thinkstock pomegranate. 8 Sixty queens there may be, and eighty concubines, and virgins beyond number; 9 but my dove, my perfect one, is unique, the only daughter of her mother, 4

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the favorite of the one who bore her. The young women saw her and called her blessed; the queens and concubines praised her. 10 Who is this that appears like the dawn, fair as the moon, bright as the sun, majestic as the stars in procession? 11 I went down to the grove of nut trees to look at the new growth in the valley, to see if the vines had budded 12

or the pomegranates were in bloom. Before I realized it, my desire set me among the royal chariots of my people.

KEY VERSE My dove, my perfect one, is unique, the only daughter of her mother, the favorite of the one who bore her. —Song of Songs 6:9

LESSON AIMS After participating in this lesson, each learner will be able to: 1. Explain the word pictures that describe the bride. 2. Tell how important it is for a husband to express appreciation for his wife. 3. State one way his or her church can help strengthen Christian marriages and offer assistance in doing so.

LESSON OUTLINE Introduction A. Obsession with Appearance B. Lesson Background

I. Overwhelming Beauty (SONG OF SONGS 6:4-7) A. Words of Love (vv. 4, 5a) B. Description of Loveliness (vv. 5b-7) What Is Beauty? It Depends!

II. Blessed Beauty (SONG OF SONGS 6:8-12) A. Praised by Others (vv. 8, 9) Honored by One’s Peers B. Sought by Her Beloved (vv. 10-12)

Conclusion A. An Issue of Interpretation

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B. Inner and Outer Beauty C. Prayer D. Thought to Remember

Introduction A. Obsession with Appearance On Wilshire Boulevard in Beverly Hills, there are offices for many physicians who specialize in cosmetic surgery. These doctors are commonly called plastic surgeons. While they do a variety of procedures for children and adults who are disfigured due to accidents or birth defects, most of their business is servicing folks who want to look better. Lest you think this is just for women, be assured that these doctors do a brisk business in cosmetic surgery for men too. Beverly Hills and Los Angeles are not the only places you will find these practitioners. There are cosmetic surgeons in every major city in America and Canada. I recently heard of cosmetic surgeons in Istanbul who specialize in transplanting hair from the back of men’s necks to their faces so that they may have fuller beards. In that culture, a full beard is considered very manly and attractive to women. These hair-transplant doctors are not lacking for business. Doubtlessly there are some who are reading or hearing this lesson who have used the services of a cosmetic surgeon, and the intent here is not to demean such folks or make them feel guilty. The point is that this phenomenon (which has been around in some form for centuries) is widespread for a reason: our desire to look good. This is not a bad thing. An appropriate level of concern for one’s appearance is a sign of physical and mental health. The two extremes of obsession and total disdain with one’s appearance may indicate emotional illness. Our lesson today concerns a woman who looks her best for her suitor.

B. Lesson Background A neglected book in our Bibles is the last one in the Old Testament section we call the Books of Poetry. The given title for this book is The Song of Songs, Which Is Solomon’s. This is often shortened to Song of Solomon or Song of Songs. Some translations use the title Canticles, which is another way of referring to songs. The book is a challenge to understand, because it is poetic dialogue with various speakers—and the speakers are not identified, as they would be if one were reading, say, a play by Shakespeare. We can assume that the male lead in this poetic drama is King Solomon, but it is difficult to pinpoint a time and place in that man’s life where this book fits. Solomon was the third king of Israel, reigning about 970-930 BC. His wealth and accomplishments were amazing. He was the builder of the great temple of the Lord in Jerusalem, as well as of lavish palaces and estates for his own pleasure. Solomon’s life included having 700 wives and 300 concubines (1 Kings 11:3). The book of the Bible at issue today pictures his relationship (or attempted relationship) with a singular woman, a shepherd girl (Song of Songs 1:8). The story behind the poetry seems to be that the king has fallen in love with this shepherdess and wants to bring her to his palace as a wife, but she pines for a boyfriend from her home village.

I. Overwhelming Beauty (SONG OF SONGS 6:4-7)

A. Words of Love (vv. 4, 5a)

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4. You are as beautiful as Tirzah, my darling, as lovely as Jerusalem, as majestic as troops with banners. This section begins with three comparisons concerning the physical beauty of the woman. Good poetry uses vivid, figurative language drawn from the world of the writer, and these images can be difficult to understand outside the original context. So we must attempt to unravel these perplexing references for understanding in our time.

HOW TO SAY IT Amminadib (Hebrew) Canaanite

Uh-min-uh-dib.

Kay-nun-ites.

Canticles

Kan-tih-kulls (i as in tip).

Clairvaux

Kler-vo.

Gilead Solomon Tirzah

Gil-ee-ud (G as in get). Sol-o-mun. Tur-zuh.

The first comparison involves a play on words involving a city named Tirzah, which means “beauty” or “pleasure.” The play on words is as if the man is saying, “She is as beautiful as Beautyville.” Tirzah is a Canaanite city that was conquered back in the time of Joshua (Joshua 12:24); it later serves as the capital of the northern kingdom of Israel (see 1 Kings 16:8). It is in a jewel-like setting of lush hillsides and flowing streams, so the name is justified. Second, the woman is compared with Jerusalem, a city that undergoes massive, expensive construction projects during Solomon’s reign. It is the most magnificent city of the region, crowned by the temple in all its splendor. The city must be breathtaking to the traveler approaching from lower elevations. The third reference is more difficult, being based on appreciation of an army arrayed in battle gear and colorful regalia. This is not the army engaged in gritty battle, but parading with its banners, brightly colored uniforms, and polished, gleaming weaponry. The word picture of this majestic sight is that of inspiring awe. In summary, we might say the woman is praised for her natural beauty (Tirzah), her impeccable grooming (Jerusalem), and her colorful, complementing clothing (parading army).

What Do You Think? What are appropriate ways to praise one’s spouse’s physical appearance?

Talking Points for Your Discussion In public In family settings On special occasions Other

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5a. Turn your eyes from me; they overwhelm me. The man now describes how this woman’s beauty affects him emotionally. When she looks at him, he is overcome that such a lovely person would glance his way. He commands as a king might, “Don’t look at me, it is more than I can stand! You make my heart race!” These are words of love, for there is much more here than a dispassionate appreciation of beauty. This woman has touched his heart.

B. Description of Loveliness (vv. 5b-7) 5b. Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from Gilead. The man continues to praise the woman’s beauty in terms that are unusual for us. We might think of a flock of goats as dirty, smelly, and noisy. But try instead to imagine a large flock of black goats, tightly packed together, moving down a hillside. When viewed from a distance, the flock would appear as a shimmering black wave, like the full black hair of the man’s beloved. This is hair that is not covered by a veil or scarf, but bouncing like the incredible hair of the models we see in TV shampoo commercials. 6. Your teeth are like a flock of sheep coming up from the washing. Each has its twin, not one of them is missing. A full set of teeth is a sign of health, and this woman is not missing any. They are as gleaming as newly washed sheep. Since the woman is darker-skinned (Song of Songs 1:5, 6), such bright, white teeth are even more striking and beautiful. This is probably more than an appreciation of dental attributes, though. It is the recognition of a lovely smile.

What Do You Think? What unique ways have you seen or heard of someone expressing love for another?

Talking Points for Your Discussion In a marriage proposal At a wedding At a renewal of wedding vows On a birthday Other

7. Your temples behind your veil are like the halves of a pomegranate. The temples of the woman’s head include her cheeks. These are the rosy-pinkish color of a pomegranate, which is a luxury fruit in Solomon’s day. As with the full set of teeth, this is an appreciation of a healthy appearance as well as of beauty. The man gets but a glimpse of this part of her face, for it is covered by her veil of hair, making her even more enticing. See also Song of Songs 4:3b.

WHAT IS BEAUTY? IT DEPENDS!

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What feminine characteristic is most important when determining beauty? Throughout history, the answer has depended greatly on one’s culture. Tattoos and other marks have long been seen as attractive features of beauty in many places. At one time, the feet of Chinese girls were bound so they would not grow; to have small feet was a thing of beauty that also had positive social-class (and negative health) implications. The elongated, brass-ringed necks of women of the Kayan tribe near the Thailand/Myanmar border exhibit another unique perception of beauty. In a practice now prohibited, Mauritian women at one time were force-fed to make them heavy and more desirable. Therefore it is not surprising that the writer’s description of a beautiful Israelite woman in ancient times seems so strange to us. He uses images that are appropriate to an ancient agrarian culture, and they simply don’t “say it” for us. The widely varying beauty standards we observe around the world tell us that physical beauty is a highly subjective matter. It also suggests there is more to real beauty than physical characteristics.—C. R. B.

II. Blessed Beauty (SONG OF SONGS 6:8-12)

A. Praised by Others (vv. 8, 9) 8. Sixty queens there may be, and eighty concubines, and virgins beyond number; The man, Solomon, acknowledges that he has 60 wives and 80 concubines already. The mention of virgins beyond number indicates that there are many future wives and concubines waiting for him. We are rightly troubled by this seemingly casual and even prideful reference to the multitude of sexual partners that Solomon experiences in his lifetime. Two things should be noted, however. Many of these wives are received as part of political alliances. When a king in the ancient world makes a pact with another king, a daughter might be given in marriage to seal the deal (example: 1 Kings 3:1). These other kings have many wives too, so there is no lack of daughters available for this purpose (compare 2 Chronicles 11:21). While this seems strange to us, it is a normal part of statecraft in Solomon’s day (but see warnings in Exodus 34:15, 16; Deuteronomy 7:1-4). That leads us to the second issue of note: despite his great wisdom, Solomon’s collection of wives ultimately proves to be unwise for the king. The religious demands of these non-Israelite women cause him to stumble spiritually (see 1 Kings 11:1-10; Nehemiah 13:26). His desire for many wives is motivated by lust for both power and pleasure (see Ecclesiastes 2:8), and both motivations cause Solomon to lose the favor of the Lord. 9. but my dove, my perfect one, is unique, the only daughter of her mother, the favorite of the one who bore her. The young women saw her and called her blessed; the queens and concubines praised her. This verse celebrates the uniqueness of the beloved woman. She is a dove, a gentle and graceful bird that makes soothing cooing sounds that are most unlike the grating cry of a crow. She has been cherished and nurtured in being the only daughter of a loving mother. The man’s rapturous estimation of her is not fantasy, for when she is presented at the royal court, all the queens and concubines are likewise impressed by her stunning beauty. The young women of the household

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give her a blessing, and the wives praise her. This is a remarkable reaction from these potential rivals! There are doubtless some great beauties among these women, so the attraction must be more than physical loveliness. The beloved woman perhaps sways them with her humble, gentle demeanor. She is too sweet to despise, even overcoming jealousy that naturally arises.

HONORED BY ONE’S PEERS Thirty-six influential members of the motion picture industry gathered in 1927 to launch the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. It was to be a means of honoring outstanding contributors to the production of motion pictures. Membership in the Academy today numbers 6,000 in 17 categories. These disciplines include many behind-the-scenes professionals whose names are seldom seen except on the credits at the end of a film. On Oscar night, the industry recognizes artists whose work in the past year has been exemplary, the physical appearances of those artists being a non-issue. But the public seems most interested in the physical attractiveness of the actors and actresses who capture media attention on the proverbial red carpet. When the king’s beloved was judged by her peers, the primary consideration seemed to be physical beauty. However, there is a hint that they saw more significant qualities in her. This may remind us of 1 Samuel 16:7: “People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” May that be our focus as well.—C. R. B.

B. Sought by Her Beloved (vv. 10-12) 10. Who is this that appears like the dawn, fair as the moon, bright as the sun, majestic as the stars in procession? The NIV presents this verse as shifting speakers from the man to “Friends.” Other versions propose that this verse continues the man’s thoughts. Either way, the woman is depicted as fresh as the new morning. She is fair and lovely as a full moon rising. Her beauty is undimmed, as bright as the sun, the most magnificent thing in the sky. In the final comparison of this verse, the Hebrew wording behind the translation majestic as the stars in procession is exactly the same as that translated “as majestic as troops with banners” in verse 4, above. The different translation here is seen necessary to maintain a continuity with the imagery of moon and sun.

What Do You Think? How do expressions of love change appropriately at various stages of a couple’s relationship?

Why? Talking Points for Your Discussion Engaged couples Newlyweds In child-rearing years As empty-nesters Other

11. I went down to the grove of nut trees

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to look at the new growth in the valley, to see if the vines had budded or the pomegranates were in bloom. The NIV proposes that we now return to the thoughts of the man; other versions have this verse to be the musing of the woman of his desire. Supporting the idea of Solomon being the speaker is a certain translation of Song of Solomon 6:12 (below). Supporting the idea of the woman’s speaking is the similar language of 7:12, given its proximity to 7:10, which says “his desire is for me.” Either way, the verse seems to indicate a break in the flow of thought, as attention turns to the various trees and vines that are in their budding, flowering, and/or spreading stages. Such a period in the agricultural cycle is a time of unmatched beauty in tended groves and vineyards. Thoughts of yearning and desire give way to meditation on the beauty of the natural world, which can have a calming effect.

What Do You Think? What is a Christian reaction to the statement “Beauty will save the world” (from a novel)?

Talking Points for Your Discussion Positive reactions Negative reactions

12. Before I realized it, my desire set me among the royal chariots of my people. This has been called one of the most difficult verses in the Bible to interpret, and English translations offer alternatives in their footnotes. Some have interpreted the image of chariots as a way of referring to the wedding bed, but this seems unlikely. The NIV’s translation takes the position that the speaker is Solomon, since he seems to be saying something like, “Ah, now I am among the royal chariots of my people.” This proposal fits with verse 11 in describing the calming effect the hike among the groves has on the man. He can imagine his status with his beloved as akin to riding in a magnificent royal chariot to the acclaim of his loving subjects. This is surely a matchless feeling that even the greatest and most popular kings enjoy but rarely. The alternative translation “among the chariots of the people of the prince,” listed in the NIV footnote, causes some to understand the speaker to be female, since princes—one of whom is the object of her desire—are male. The other footnoted alternative, “among the chariots of Amminadab,” creates further uncertainty, since the word Amminadab is a transliteration. Its literal meaning of “my noble people” supports the idea of Solomon speaking. But Amminadab can also be a personal name, as in 1 Chronicles 15:11.

What Do You Think? What analogies would you suggest for describing

inner qualities rather than physical beauty? Talking Points for Your Discussion 1 Samuel 16:7 Isaiah 53:2

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Galatians 5:22, 23 1 Peter 3:3, 4 Other

Conclusion A. An Issue of Interpretation From ancient times, the sensual nature of the poetry in the Song of Songs has been offensive to some. On the surface, there is little doctrinal content here. This has caused some to interpret the book figuratively as an expression of the love of God for Israel or as the love of Christ for the church in a prophetic sense. An extreme example of this is Bernard of Clairvaux (1090-1153), a medieval French abbot who was the most famous preacher of his day. By the time of his death, he had completed 86 sermons on the Song of Solomon, and these took him only into chapter 3—less than half way through the book! In these sermons, Bernard explores the spiritual idea of the heavenly bridegroom (Christ, the Word) and his relationship with his earthly bride (either the church or the individual believer, see Revelation 19:7). These are powerful, beautiful sermons, but they have little to do with the intended meaning of the Song of Solomon. This type of figurative interpretation of the Song of Songs still makes itself known in the church today. When we sing, “I am my beloved’s and he is mine; his banner over me is love” from Song of Songs 6:3 combined with 2:4, we are not celebrating the human love that those passages indicate, but the love that Christ has for us. When we sing of Christ as the “rose of Sharon” or the “lily of the valley,” we are ignoring the original context of Song of Songs 2:1, which speaks of the beauty of a woman. May we seek to understand the Song of Songs as originally intended: in terms of the powerful language of human love. As we do, we will learn how God intends us to appreciate the beauty of our marriage partners. While these may be uncomfortable as lesson topics for some, there is nothing unseemly here.

B. Inner and Outer Beauty The woman who is the object of the king’s affections in today’s lesson was a stunning beauty, to be sure. But what was it about her that drew his attentions so dramatically and in such an obsessively focused way? Surely there were other women of great physical beauty among his household of wives and concubines! Yet none seems to have excited his passions like this one. It is probably accurate to say that there is more here than meets the eye. Many indications in this book strongly hint that this woman was as lovely in character as she was in physical attributes. She was not a sophisticated courtesan, a product of the royal court and the big city. She was a simple country girl, innocent and pure, and was not overwhelmed by the attentions of the king. While God had blessed her with physical attractiveness that turned the head of the king, she had not cheapened this with pettiness, arrogance, or pride. The book does not describe her spiritually, but a secure relationship with God would have contributed to her attractiveness. When I perform a wedding, I have a little custom. While I am standing in the front of the church with the groom and the music of the wedding march begins, the bride will appear in the back of the aisle, usually with her father. At that point I always lean over to the groom and say, “Just look at her. She is the most beautiful woman in the world right now, and she has made herself beautiful for you. Don’t ever forget this moment.” And she is and she has. And the groom always smiles because he knows that it is true. Even a woman who

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is unattractive by worldly standards glows with joy and happiness on her wedding day. It is due to more than an expensive dress, the work of a hair stylist, or the craft of a makeup artist. She is truly beautiful because she is committing herself to her beloved and he to her.

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Visual for Lesson 5 & 6. Point to this visual as you pose the discussion question on page 165. May we who are married remember that day. Perhaps the years have not been kind to us when it comes to physical beauty. Try as we might to delay the effects of aging, those effects are relentless and universal. Even the world’s greatest cosmetic surgeons can do only so much, and sometimes their work even distorts the handsomeness of an older person. Yet a bright smile, gentle eyes, soft speech, loving words, and a humble spirit are ultimately more attractive than any other features of beauty, no matter what our culture tells us.

C. Prayer God of both men and women, you created us to be in relationships. Often these are hard, strained, even broken. Give us wisdom and grace to appreciate the inner beauty of character. We pray this in the name of Jesus our beautiful Savior. Amen.

D. Thought to Remember Praise and celebrate strong marriages.

INVOLVEMENT LEARNING Into the Lesson Have this partial sentence displayed as your class assembles: The greatest love song ever written is __________. Ask learners how they would complete the sentence. After each suggestion, ask, “Why is that your choice?” After several suggestions and reasons are offered, make a transition as you say, “The book of the Bible we look at today, the Song of Songs, could be called the greatest love song ever written. Let’s see why.” Alternative. Ask, “How important is it for one person to express appreciation for the other in a dating or wedded relationship?” After a few responses, ask, “Are words enough, or does a love relationship require a more tangible demonstration of affection?” After everyone has had a chance to respond, play a version of the song “Show Me” from My Fair Lady (the lyrics and video are readily available online). Then ask if anyone would like to change his or her answer to the second question (expect humorous reactions). Make the transition noted above.

Into the Word Give each learner a handout featuring the phrases below to complete. Say, “In today’s text, Solomon speaks glowingly of the one to whom he is attracted. Complete each of the expressions on your handout with a modern-day compliment.” You are as beautiful as the city of _______ (v. 4). Your eyes make me _______ (v. 5a). Your hair has the glossy sheen of _______ (v. 5b). Your smile makes me think of _______ (v. 6).

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Your face has the glow of _______ (v. 7). When other women see you, they __________ (vv. 8, 9). Your appearance reminds me of a morning that __________ (v. 10). When thoughts of you begin to drive me crazy, I go to __________ to regain calm (v. 11). When I think of you, I feel like _______ (v. 12). You may need to adjust your directions based on the nature of your class. For example, if your class is women-only, you might say, “Complete these sentences with words you would like to hear.” Option. For deeper discussion regarding the nature of the marriage relationship as God intends, distribute copies of the “Husbands and Wives” activity from the reproducible page, which you can download. One way to use this activity is to read and discuss all 10 passages as a whole-class exercise, but this can be very time-consuming. Another method is to assign the texts to pairs or small groups, half being designated What to Do and the other half designated What Not to Do; pairs/groups will present summaries of the texts to the class according to those designations. Discuss what connections learners see with today’s lesson text.

Into Life Announce a brainstorming session by saying, “Let’s think of ways our church can encourage and strengthen Christian marriages.” Before beginning, stress that a brainstorm list accepts all suggestions for initial inclusion, so no negative reactions are allowed for ideas as first offered. Jot all responses on the board. If the group hesitates or seems stuck, consider using stimulus questions such as the following to get ideas flowing: What could be included in our curriculum for teens and young adults in regard to Christian marriage? What wedding or anniversary gifts would best help couples think about the commitment they make at and in marriage? How could our class provide childcare for parents to have periodic getaways? What about financial planning guidance? Option. Distribute copies of the “Solomon’s Wives” activity from the reproducible page. Depending on the nature of your class and the time available, this can be either a whole-class or small-group activity, to be completed as indicated.

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