PLAYS FOR YOUNG AUDIENCES
A PARTNERSHIP OF SEATTLE CHILDREN’S THEATRE AND CHILDREN’S THEATRE COMPANY-MINNEAPOLIS
2400 THIRD AVENUE SOUTH MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA 55404 612-872-5108 FAX 612-874-8119 www.playsforyoungaudiences.org
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective Story by Carolyn Keene Adapted for the Stage by Marisha Chamberlain
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective was first presented by The Children’s Theatre Company for the 1989-90 season.
The license issued in connection with PYA perusal scripts is a limited license, and is issued for the sole purpose of reviewing the script for a potential future performance. All other rights regarding perusal scripts are expressly reserved by Plays for Young Audiences, including, but not limited to, the rights to distribute, perform, copy or alter scripts. This limited license does not convey any performance rights of any kind with this material. By accepting any perusal script(s), Licensee agrees to and is bound by these terms.
Characters Nancy Drew Carson Drew, Nancy’s father Miss Willoughby, Carson’s temporary secretary (doubled with Tammi Whitlock) Hamilton Spencer, Director of the Barn Theater Margo Spencer, Hamilton’s wife Emily Spencer, the 18-year-old daughter of Margo and Hamilton Bob Simpson, Emily’s boyfriend/leading man of The Footlighters George Fayne, Nancy’s friend and able assistant Bess Marvin, George’s cousin and Nancy’s assistant Ned Nickerson, Nancy’s boyfriend Emmet ‘Cally’ Calhoun, friend of the Spencers’ Tammi Whitlock, leading lady of The Footlighters Tom Tozzle, crook Bushy Trott, goon Chief McGinnis, of the River Heights Police Department Other Footlighters: Yvonne, Phyllis, Ivy, Ulric, Otto and Jamie
TIME AND PLACE: River Heights, a small town somewhere in America. Early 1940s. SETTINGS: Carson Drew’s law office in River Heights and in the nearby countryside. The Van Pelt estate The Barn Theater
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
1
ACT ONE: SCENE ONE As the act curtain rises, the Footlighters, amateur stage hands under the direction of their stage manager, Jamie, set the furniture for Carson drew's law office. Carson drew, Hamilton Spencer and Margo Spencer, and miss Willoughby enter and Jamie positions them for the top of the show. JAMIE
Go music!
Musical intro. CARSON DREW
(To the audience) Once again, mystery had invaded our little town of River Heights where I, Carson Drew – ‚ the outstanding criminal lawyer. A tall, distinguished man of middle age who raise a daughter alone because of the untimely death of my wife many years ago.‛ This daughter of mine, Nancy, has proven to be an exceptional girl with powers of observation so keen I often discussed my cases with her; in short, she is a born detective. (Lights up on Hamilton Spencer, seated in Carson's office.) I’d come to my office expecting a quite morning, no appointments, but there I met –
HAMILTON
- Mr. Hamilton Spencer, actor. Tall, slender, meticulously slightly graying, yet ever possessing a youthful vitality and a winning smile. (Exhibits smile.)
Lights up on Margo Spencer. MARGO
- and his worried wife, the actress Margo Spencer.
CARSON DREW
They seemed on that morning to be the victims of some illusion, some apparition on the grounds of the old Van Pelt estate, home of the Footlighter’s Barn Theater.
HAMILTON
A puppet. A puppet. A dancing puppet.
MARGO
A ghost, Hamilton. A ghost.
CARSON DREW
The old Barn Theater stood on the estate of Leander Van Pelt who had been my client before his decease – a peculiar man, stodgy and puritanical, who had found freedom creating strange inventions Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
2
and speculating in precious gems. As executor of his estate, I knew he had accumulated a fortune. But it was peculiar that so few gems remained in the estate, with the exception of a casket of diamonds, bequeathed to Hamilton and Margo’s daughter Emily on her eighteenth birthday. (The secretary, Miss Willoughby draws closer to Carson, hanging on his every word.) - of a handsome casket of diamonds -- Yes, Miss Willoughby? (Startled, Miss Willoughby shakes her head and withdraws.) At any rate, when Van Pelt died, rumors abounded that a hidden cache still existed of diamonds, rubies, emeralds and sapphires. Now, rumor of a ghost. MARGO
Not a rumor! I’ve seen her with my own eyes!
HAMILTON
Margo! A dancing puppet. Mr. Drew, I have worries on my mind. I need the power of the law. We’re being plagued by a puppet –
MARGO
A ghost!
HAMILTON
A nuisance, really. A life-sized dancing ballerina puppet that only comes out at night and –
MARGO
It’s not a puppet. It’s Althea! Althea’s ghost! Our daughter, our darling Althea. She was a dancer, you see, but we never should have allowed her to dance.
HAMILTON
She had to dance, darling. It was what she loved.
MARGO
She had a weak heart and was stricken in the middle of a performance - struck down dead by a heart attack. Althea! And now her lonely ghost visits us, night after night.
HAMILTON
(To the others, while the sobbing Margo buries her face in his shirt front) But is a puppet. You can see the joints. It moves just like a marionette.
CARSON DREW
I’d better have you tell my daughter.
HAMILTON
Your daughter?
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
3
Miss Willoughby, returns, preceded by Bess Marvin and her cousin, George Fayne, Nancy's tomboy friend. WILLOUGHBY
I told them to wait but they –
GEORGE
- barged in. Didn’t want to miss –
BESS
- any clues!
CARSON DREW
(To Hamilton) May I introduce –
GEORGE
George Fayne, a bright-eyed athletic girl, born adventurer with an above aptitude for –
BESS
- and her cousin, Bess, quite pretty but possessing an unfortunate weakness for –
GEORGE
For mystery!
BESS
For sweets, actually.
GEORGE
Bess!
BESS
Mr. and Mrs. Spencer! What are you doing here?
MARGO
Why, hello Bess –
HAMILTON
Miss Marvin. What are you doing here?
CARSON DREW
You know each other?
BESS
I’m working as a scene painter for the Footlighters this summer. Nancy called us –
GEORGE
And said to meet here. To come directly.
George and Bess sit. CARSON DREW
Mmmhmm. (To Miss Willoughby.) Tea for the girls?
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
4
BESS
Forgive me, Miss but –
WILLOUGHBY
Yes?
BESS
- have you ever been on stage?
WILLOUGHBY
Why, no.
BESS
Do you have perhaps a twin sister who’s an actress?
WILLOUGHBY
Certainly not.
CARSON DREW
Oh, forgive me for neglecting introductions. Girls, this is Miss Willoughby. The agency sent her over while the regular secretary is on vacation.
Miss Willoughby "exits", remaining nearby to eavesdrop. CARSON DREW
Ah. Here she is, finally. Here’s –
BESS
- the golden haired, blue eyed –
GEORGE
- fiercely intelligent and courageous –
BESS
- and dressed for action with an eye to fashion –
Nancy Drew enters, followed by Ned Nickerson. NANCY
Nancy Drew, detective.
MARGO
Nancy Drew?
NANCY
Sorry to be late. Look who I ran into on the way –
NED
Ned Nickerson, the tall handsome football captain from Emerson College.
BESS
Nancy's best beau.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
5
NED
Nancy’s only beau.
NANCY
Dreadfully sorry to barge in late.
HAMILTON
That girl can help?
CARSON DREW
You’d be surprised. This is Hamilton and Margo Spencer. Nancy Drew.
His arms still around Margo, Hamilton extends a hand to Nancy and she shakes it, gravely. NANCY
Would someone care to tell me what it’s all about?
GEORGE
(At the same time as Bess, Margo, and Hamilton.) You know, they’re out at the Barn Theater, and at night this thing appears – a puppet or something – a ballerina puppet. He says it’s got jointed arms and legs so it couldn’t be real.
BESS
(At the same time as George, Margo and Hamilton.) They’re, you know, actors and actresses and they can’t sleep at night because of this ghost. He says a puppet but it reminders her of her daughter Althea, who was a ballerina and so –
HAMILTON
(At the same time as Bess and George.) It appears every night –
MARGO
(At the same time as Bess and George.) Not it, she appears, high in the air –
HAMILTON
(At the same time as Bess and George.) Always beyond reach, you see. We can’t capture it, we can’t sleep at night, and my wife as you can see, is on the point of breakdown!
NANCY
Hmmhmm. Yes, I see. Maybe it is the ghost of your daughter, Mrs. Spencer. Or maybe somebody is trying to frighten you.
HAMILTON
And succeeding.
NANCY
It’s possible, isn’t it? (Margo still sniffling, nods) Myself, I don’t believe in ghosts. Might I have permission to investigate?
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
6
HAMILTON
You?
MARGO
Nancy Drew, dear. You’ve heard of Nancy Drew.
HAMILTON
I didn’t think she’d be so young. Isn’t she supposed to be whitehaired and British?
MARGO
You’re thinking of Agatha Christie. This is Nancy Drew.
HAMILTON
Very well. Very well. Come out to the estate, Miss Drew. Investigate away. We’ve got to get some sleep at night. My poor wife –
MARGO
She’ll have to stay over. It only goes on at night. Can you come at once? We’ll put you up –
NANCY
May I, Father?
CARSON DREW
I don’t know, Nancy. If someone is trying to frighten people, it could be dangerous to stay out at the theater.
NANCY
Bess is out there every day anyway, painting scenery. George could get permission – (To George.) – couldn’t you? Safety in numbers, Father. (To Margo) Have you room for us?
MARGO
Certainly.
GEORGE
We’ll need a cover, Nance.
BESS
Why don’t we just tell everyone she’s helping me paint the scenery?
NED
What about the college dance tonight, Nancy?
NANCY
Oh, dear.
HAMILTON
Then, if that’s settled, you’ll excuse us. We have a play to rehearse.
MARGO
We’ll expect you this evening? (Margo and Hamilton exit.)
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
7
NANCY
Sorry, Ned. I’ll come up to the college dance next week – and I’ll dance every dance with you.
NED
Awww, Nancy ...
NANCY
Now, Ned. . .
NED
I know – it’s a mystery. Myself, I’m interested in reality. In football. And in... uh, in you, Nancy. You’ll come next weekend?
NANCY
It’s a promise. (Ned exits.) Father? May I go? ...Pardon me, have we met?
Nancy crosses quickly and extends her hand to the lurking Miss Willoughby. Miss Willoughby shakes Nancy's and turns quickly away. CARSON DREW
Miss Willoughby, my daughter, Nancy.
WLLLOUGHBY
Mr. Drew, with your permission, I’ll be off on errands? (Carson nods ‘yes’ and she exits.)
CARSON DREW
Those temporary secretaries are so nervous and anxious to please.
NANCY
Your regular secretary returns from vacation soon?
CARSON DREW
Tomorrow morning.
NANCY
That’s good. So. Father, what’s your answer? May I go?
CARSON DREW
I don’t know.
NANCY
I’m always careful.
CARSON DREW
Well, I remember one time you were locked in a closet and left for dead, and another time you were chloroformed and nobody heard from you for three days and a third time you were lashed to a tree all night in the pouring rain and –
NANCY
But none of those times were my fault. And I always managed to get free. Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
8
CARSON DREW
Yes. Every time so car. Do remember you’re the only detective I’ve got. Alright, you may go.
NANCY
(kisses him) You’re a peach!
SCENE TWO Montage: Music, no dialogue. Backstage at the Barn Theater on the Van Pelt Estate, home of the Footlighter’s theater company. Tammi Whitlock and Bob Simpson, leading lady and leading man, rehearse a love scene. Lights up in the hayloft on Emmet ‘Cally’ Calhoun, retired actor, sitting on a hay bale, raptly reading an ancient diary. The lights flicker. Cally takes out a pen light and continues reading. Emily, the Spencers’ melancholy daughter, hesitantly enters to watch the rehearsal. Bob brightens and waves to Emily as Tammi retreats a few steps and begins the scene again. In the hayloft above, Cally slips the diary into a hole in the hay. Nancy, George and Bess enter upstage from between the proscenium curtains. NANCY
We arrived that evening, as promised, at the Van Pelt Estate, home of the Footlighters Theater. Okay, Bess, what else can you tell us? Anyone suspicious?
BESS
Well... there’s this actress named Tammi. Tammi Whitlock. The star, really. The leading lady. She’s the best actress ever, really, I think she could be in the movies.
GEORGE
Get to the point.
BESS
Well, she gets the leading man, Bob Simpson, and makes him rehearse their love scene over and over – Tammi seems awfully in love with him – but I don’t think he loves her back, because of Emily.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
9
NANCY
Bob loves Emily?
BESS
Emily is his fiancé. I don’t think he even likes Tammi – and she’s grumpy and mean any time she’s not on stage with him. But aren’t great stars always grumpy and mean?
NANCY
If they are, they don’t deserve our admiration.
Cally steps onto the stage floor, approaches Tammi, takes her hand and attempts to kiss it. She shakes him off and exits as Jamie signals the shift into scene three.
SCENE THREE Lights up in the kitchen on the van pelt estate. Margo ushers Bess, George and Nancy into the kitchen. GEORGE
What a house!
BESS
(aside) Mansion, George. It’s a mansion.
NANCY
(aside to the audience) We arrived that evening, as promised, at the Van Pelt Estate, home of the Barn Theater.
MARGO
Yes, I suppose it is a mansion.
NANCY
You’ve always lived here?
MARGO
Oh, no. The estate belong to Hamilton’s uncle, Old Mr. Van Pelt. We’ve only lived here since his death and since Emily – here she is. Come and meet –
Emily enters, on Bob's arm. BOB
Till after rehearsal, sweetheart. Chin up?
BESS
There he is... the leading man.
BOB
(to audience) Bob Simpson, "Artist. Romantic. Idealist.‛ Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
10
BESS
Isn’t he dreamy?
Rob winks at Bess and exits. Bess gasps. MARGO
May I present – let’s see –Bess Marvin –
BESS
What? Oh -- (extends her hand to Emily)
EMILY
But I know you. You’re with the Footlighters – you’re an actress?
BESS
Only a scene painter. And this is my cousin, George Fayne.
GEORGE
A stagehand, or about to be. I move scenery – pound nails – anything you require.
EMILY
Oh, you don’t have to apply to me. I’m not with the theater.
GEORGE
You’re not?
BESS
Why not? Don’t you like it?
MARGO
(Quickly) And this is Nancy Drew.
NANCY
(Overlapping) Just Nancy.
EMILY
Mother said – the Nancy Drew – here to solve our mystery.
NANCY
Here to paint scenery. I’m sure I can count on your discretion.
EMILY
Ah, I see. Of course. So good to have you. Mother, she’s very nice –
MARGO
Would you like to invite them to your party? Emily turns eighteen tomorrow.
BESS
Jeepers, do you?
GEORGE
Golly!
NANCY
Congratulations!
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
11
MARGO
And we're having a dress-up affair.
EMILY
Oh, Mother – no. Not a dress-up party when everyone is so frazzled working so hard to get the play ready.
MARGO
Oh, but –
EMILY
Please. Let them come in their rehearsal togs. I really would prefer it. That way, I’ll feel more. . . part of things . . .
MARGO
Tomorrow's the day she gets her diamonds. Our Emily is a heiress.
EMILY
Oh, Mother, they're not interested in that!
BESS
Diamonds? Can we see them?
GEORGE
Of course we're interested!
EMILY
I haven't seen them myself. But I'd he thrilled if you'd come to my party tomorrow evening –
MARGO
When the diamonds will be presented.
EMILY
Will you?
MARGO
And we'll have a lovely celebration -- a little picnic in the garden?
EMILY
Yes. Just a little picnic.
BESS
Of course we’ll come –
MARGO
- and everything will be alright, won’t it dear?
EMILY
Yes, of course. I’m simply... thrilled.
NANCY
(aside to audience) But she didn’t seem thrilled... Emily, I’d like to ask you something.
MARGO
Why don’t you show them up to their rooms, dear?
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
12
EMILY
Oh, of course. Follow me.
NANCY
If we could speak – just the two of us?
Emily exits with Nancy. Bess tries to follow but George detains her, to allow Nancy to question Emily alone. GEORGE
We’ll be along in a minute. This is such a large kitchen, Mrs. Spencer.
MANGO
Yes, and a good thing too. We have to feed the entire company. I cook for them myself.
GEORGE
That sounds like a lot of work.
MARGO
Emily helps me. Even if I’m not able to sleep – I have to – believe one must keep busy.
BESS
But aren’t you an actress? I heard you were great.
MARGO
Were?!? Yes – well – so some said. But all that is out of the question now. I can’t even remember lines.
Lights up in Nancy’s bedroom. Outside, the sun begins to set. EMILY
I’ve always liked this room. Look – (indicates window)
NANCY
Spectacular view. Tell me something, Emily. I don’t mean to pry, but there you are, a lovely girl, about to turn eighteen and inherit a fortune, and engaged to be married to a handsome man who appears to adore you and yet you don’t seem at all –
EMILY
Happy?
NANCY
Is it the puppet?
EMILY
I’d leave in a minute – go anywhere – fly to the moon – but Father would never forgive me. He wants me to have the money.
NANCY
Money? Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
13
EMILY
Because he’s never had any, you see – having been an actor all his life. The money. Forgive me. I’m muddled. We haven’t been sleeping.
NANCY
The puppet –
EMILY
The will – the power of a last will and testament. Great Uncle had no children of his own and he was enraged that his only nephew, my father, would ‘waste his life’ on stage. You’ve met Father. A great talent. A born actor. Not himself, just now. He hasn’t been sleeping.
NANCY
The puppet.
EMILY
Great Uncle Van Pelt, reaching past the grave. For some reason he chose me. He left the diamonds and the entire estate to me on two conditions: I must live on the grounds, and I must never, never go on the stage.
NANCY
Not a puppet, you think. Your Great Uncle’s ghost?
EMILY
I don’t know what it is. It appears. It floats. It frightens us and all I know is that my poor parents wouldn’t have to endure this if it weren’t for me, having to live here –
NANCY
In order to receive the inheritance.
EMILY
Nancy... could I tell you a secret?
NANCY
Of course.
EMILY
Just for myself, I rather think the stage is the best thing there is in life... Childish fantasy. Don’t worry, I know my place. I have responsibilities. Fate made me a heiress.
Full sun set.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
14
SCENE FOUR Night. Backstage perspective. Up in the loft in a pool of light, the notorious criminal, Tom Tozzle searches the floor. Tom finds the book Cally had tucked into a hay bale.
SCENE FIVE Moonrise. Lights up in Nancy’s bedroom on Nancy, George and Bess in shorty pajamas. George yawns. GEORGE
Time to turn in. C'mon Bess.
BESS
(To Nancy) Are you going to bed?
NANCY
Certainly. Goodnight, sleep tight. Don’t let the puppet bite.
BESS
Nancy – don’t. Puppets don’t bite, do they?
GEORGE
They do if they have teeth. Big, sharp ivory teeth!
BESS
George!
GEORGE
Don’t worry. I’ll guard you with my judo. Remember, I’ve got a green belt in judo.
BESS
Oh, you’ll just fall asleep.
GEORGE
And so will you. You sleep like a rock.
BESS
Do not!
GEORGE
(To Nancy) We’re rooming together – we’ll be fine. (To Bess) You sleep like a rock – and you snore.
NANCY
Goodnight!
Nancy looks out the window a moment, places her robe on the bedpost, lies down on top of the covers. The moon moves across the sky.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
15
A woman is heard crying. Nancy gets up and crosses quickly to the window, looks out left, sees something, exclaims under her breath. Stage right, the puppet floats into view. A ballerina puppet, played by an actress, but making mechanical movements. Margo enters left, into the yard. MARGO
Althea. Oh, Althea. Is it you? Speak to me. Oh, darling girl. Dear ghost. What can I do for you? Tell me.
Nancy hurriedly puts on her robe and exits. Down of the puppet, an unlit figure enters from left and crosses the yard. The puppet moves upstage. A second unlit figure enters down right and starts across the yard. The two figures collide. Two flashlights snap on, illuminating Nancy and Hamilton. The puppet vanishes. HAMILTON
Oh, it’s you . . . Nancy Drew.
NANCY
Good evening, Mr. Spencer.
MARGO
(offstage) Hamilton? Hamilton. Did you see? She’s here with us again. Oh, Althea.
HAMILTON
Go back to bed, darling. I'm coming. (TO NANCY) And now it’s gone. No point in standing in the yard all night, is there? You’ve seen all there is. Goodnight, Miss Drew.
NANCY
Good night.
Nancy exits. Hamilton remains standing in the yard. George arrives in the yard, Bess in tow, both in pajamas, no robes. HAMILTON
No point standing in the yard all night...
GEORGE
Here we are. Where is it?
HAMILTON
Gone.
GEORGE
Rats! We missed it.
BESS
Good. Fine with me.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
16
GEORGE
Bess! Mr. Spencer, what exactly did you see? Could you describe it?
HAMILTON
I told you. A ballerina. A ballerina puppet. Or, if you ask Mrs. Spencer, a ghost. You girls aren’t dressed to be out. Good night.
GEORGE
Rats.
They exit. Stillness. Lights up slowly on Nancy in her bedroom, gazing out the window. The puppet once again floats on right and beckons to Nancy. NANCY
Puppet. Perhaps. If a ghost, I’d say you’re a ghost with a brain.
SCENE SIX Morning. Lights up in the kitchen on Emily and Margo, preparing breakfast. EMILY
Mother, who's that in the yard?
MARGO
The new gardener, dear.
EMILY
I thought you liked to do the garden yourself.
MARGO
Well, yes, I did until yesterday. But Tammi said –
EMILY
Tammi said?
MARGO
She said I try to do too much.
EMILY
I suppose she’s right about that.
MARGO
Too much heavy work in the garden. And what do you think, the very same day, a gentleman comes to the door and asks for a job as gardener.
Nancy, George and Bess enter. NANCY
(gazing through the window) He’s got the build for heavy work.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
17
BESS
But not a very pleasant expression.
NANCY
Good morning, Mrs. Spencer.
MARGO
Good morning, Nancy!
NANCY
Emily.
MARGO
Nancy – last night – you saw her? Our ghost?
NANCY
I saw something.
MARGO
And . . . ? (Nancy shrugs.)
BESS
(To audience) The following morning, we were no closer to solving the mystery. What could we do but eat? (To Margo) Sweet rolls! My I put the icing on?
MARGO
They need icing?
BESS
Let me do it. I know all about icing.
Cally enters with Hamilton. CALLY
‘Tis an ill cook that cannot lick his own fingers.’
HAMILTON
Too early in the morning for quotations, Cally ol’ boy.
CALLY
Too early! ‘Night’s candles are burnt out, and jocund day –
NANCY
‘Stands tiptoe on the misty mountaintops.’
CALLY
Romeo and Juliet. Very good.
NANCY
‘Foolery, sir, does walk about the orb like the sun; it shines everywhere.’
CALLY
As You Like It. A girl after my own heart.
HAMILTON
Allow me to present – Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
18
CALLY
Emmet Calhoun.
HAMILTON
- Cally ol’ boy. Shakespearean actor –
CALLY
(to audience) Claiming, of course, great former glory – semi-retired through no wish of his own; by the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, beaten down, discouraged and, frankly, out of work.
MARGO
Not at all. Building costumes for the Footlighters. (Introducing) George, Bess and Nancy.
CALLY
Not an actress – pity. Nancy Drew, Detective.
NANCY
As apparently everyone knows.
CALLY
Be glad I know. I can tell you a few things. A detective might have a field day, here.
NANCY
You don’t say?
CALLY
This old estate is full of secrets. I know some of ‘em. Learned a new one yesterday.
Lights up slowly in the hayloft. In the dim light, Bushy Trott, notorious criminal, searches the wall, floor and ceiling for a secret panel. Tammi enters the kitchen. Cally goes dreamy-eyed. TAMMI
Well. Good morning, Nancy Drew.
CALLY
Miss Whitlock.
NANCY
Hello, Tammi.
MARGO
Why, Tammi. You’re here early.
HAMILTON
Go back home. Rehearsal’s not for hours.
TAMMI
A true professional can be found rehearsing at any hour. Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
19
Hamilton clears his throat, ironically. BESS
With Bob Simpson?
TAMMI
If he’s available.
Emily gives Tammi a cold stare. Tammi meets the stare. NANCY
(aside, to Cally) Answer something for me, Mr. Calhoun. It’s an enormous barn out there, isn’t it? Surrounding the theater? Mr. Calhoun?
CALLY
‘If ever thou shalt love, in the sweet pangs of it, remember me,’ Twelfth Night.
NANCY
The barn.
CALLY
Yes, enormous. We turned the milking stalls to dressing rooms, with space behind for the costume and scene shops.
Tammi takes Margo aside. TAMMI
I don’t mean to alarm you, Mrs. Spencer, but you look a bit unwell.
MARGO
Oh, really?
TAMM I
Pale and drawn. I wonder why?
NANCY
What’s above?
CALLY
Nothing but an old hay loft.
NANCY
I think I’ll take a look around – and speak to you later. I’m pleased to have met you, Mr. Calhoun. (exits)
TAMMI
You’re doing too much. You’re doing the work of a gang of servants.
MARGO
I hired a gardener. Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
20
TAMMI
How about a cook? Have you thought of hiring a cook?
MARGO
I hate to spend Emily’s inheritance.
EMILY
Spend it, Mother. It’s only money.
TAMMI
You ought to hire a cook.
A wedge of light opens on the stage floor. Nancy steps into the barn. MARGO
We take breakfast in the garden. Follow me, girls. Will you join us, Cally? ...Tammi?
TAMMI
In a moment.
With breakfast on trays, all exit except Tammi. She goes quickly to the phone and dials. In the barn loft, a panel opens in the ceiling and a witch head drops down. Hearing Nancy’s foot on the barn floor, Bushy closes the panel and exits with the witch puppet. TAMMI
(over the phone) You found the... well, tickety boo! You found the thing... You didn’t find the thing... You found a little thing but not the big thing. Well, keep looking... Yeah, he knows something – the old wheezer – the Shakespeare guy – but he’s too dumb to do anything about it... Give me two minutes, then buzz... You know what I said to her – she looks tired – she works too hard. Uh-huh, she’s gonna crack!
Cally enters the kitchen, looking for Tammi. She drops the phone into the cradle and glares at him. TAMMI
Can’t a person make a private call?
CALLY
I missed you at the table. Aren’t you hungry at all? You must eat. You’re but a child; ‘A child of our Grandmother’s Eve, or, for thy more sweet understand, a woman,’ Love’s Labour’s Lost.
TAMMI
So, Mr. Calhoun. You’ve found out something? Something new about the estate?
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
21
CALLY
Perhaps I have.
Nancy enters the loft and looks around. In the hidden staircase, Tom begins, slowly, to dial the phone. TAMMI
Well, what? What have you found?
CALLY
Oh, but if I tell you, you’d have to be courteous.
TAMMI
Alright – please.
CALLY
More than courteous, you’d have to show sweet understanding.
Bess enters the kitchen. BESS
‘Scuse me. Forgot the sugar bowl. (The kitchen phone rings.) I’ll get it.
Cally and Tammi exit. Emily enters. Bess answers the phone. BESS
Hello? . . . Where's Nancy? It’s for Nancy.
EMILY
I think she went out to the barn. (calls out the kitchen door) Nancy! You’re wanted on the telephone.
George and Margo enter the kitchen. GEORGE
Did you ask who's calling?
BESS
No, I didn’t.
GEORGE
No one’s supposed to know we’re out here.
NANCY
Coming!
Nancy reluctantly abandons the search. Exiting the barn, Nancy encounters bushy Trott, the "gardener" leaning on his rake. He gives her a hard stare. BESS
(telephone) Who’s calling, please? (covering the mouthpiece) ‚A secret admirer.‛ But he sounds sort of old to be a boyfriend.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
22
Nancy enters the kitchen. Bess hands her the phone. NANCY
Yes? (covers the mouthpiece with her hand, transmitting the conversation.) ‚I am the dancing puppet. If you know what’s good for you, Nancy Drew, you’ll pick up and leave – (Bess reacts with alarm; George shushes her.) – ‚you and your defenseless little friends– ‚
GEORGE
Defenseless! (demonstrates a judo chop)
NANCY
‚If you value your health, you’ll bug out! Amscray! Chase yourselves! Do you take my meaning?‛ (she takes a breath, speaks into the receiver) If you mean you’d prefer us to go home, I think I understand. You’ll forgive me for observing that you don’t sound much like a ballerina – and I don’t find a ballerina frightening in the first place. (cackles like a witch, imitating the caller) What? A Halloween Goblin? Well, trick or treat to you. You’d better brush up on your acting if you really wish to frighten anyone at all. (slams the receiver down.) Playacting. Empty threats.
BESS
How do you know it’s an empty threat?
NANCY
Because if they really intended to hurt us, they wouldn’t warn us; they’d just strike.
BESS
Jeepers Creepers, we’d better get out of here.
NANCY
Now it’s getting interesting. Tell me, Margo. How many phones do you have?
MARGO
Just this one in the kitchen.
NANCY
Really. Do you mind if I confirm that? (Dials) Phone company. Hello – yes, can you tell me how many lines you have coming in to the Old Van Pelt estate? Two separate lines? And what’s the second number? Unlisted? No, I know you can’t tell me. Thanks, anyway.
MARGO
A second line? How can that be?
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
23
NANCY
Not how, but where? The question is – where is that second telephone?
SCENE SEVEN Barn theater. Rehearsal in progress. Hamilton directs Tammi and Bob in the love scene we saw mimed in the prologue. Also in the scene: Ivy, playing the maid, Agatha. Jamie on book in the wings. Otto standing by with sound effects. JAMIE
Standby, rain.
TAMMI
. . . but I want to comfort you, Emery – poor heartbroken soldier boy –
BOB
I'm a man now Amanda – not a fool boy.
TAMMI
Leave us alone, Agatha. (Ivy gives Tammi a blank stare.)
JAMIE
Go, rain. Standby, thunder.
Otto makes rain sounds. TAMMI
I said, leave us alone Agatha. . . . "Yes, ma'am."
JAMIE
(Prompts Ivy) Your line is, "Yes, ma'am."
IVY
Yes, ma'am. (Ivy Exits. )
TAMMI
Have your feelings toward me so changed? Oh –
JAMIE
Go, thunder. (Otto sounds thunder)
TAMMI
- this awful, ugly war!
HAMILTON
CUT! Cut. Amanda, Amanda. . .
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
24
Nancy and Bess enter. Bess gets her paint and brush, hands a brush to Nancy, and they resume painting scenery. Otto reckons to George, who takes over the thunder machine. Cally enters and resumes work on a costume. HAMILTON
Don’t touch him yet, Amanda. you are a sensitive Southern girl. You would never rush him. Courtesy. A certain aesthetic distance.
NANCY
(Aside To Bess) I wish I could get back up to the hay loft. I barely had a chance to look around.
HAMILTON
Take it from the letter.
BOB
The letter...
JAMIE
Stand by thunder. ‚Your brother – ‚
ROB
Your brother wrote me a letter.
TAMMI
Oh, but you must not believe my brother. He’d like to break my heart. He’d like to hound me to death – all because of the inheritance! Look at me, Emery –
JAMIE
Go thunder. (George makes vigorous thunder)
TAMMI
You know m e. Put your arms around me, as you know you want to. Kiss me, Emery.
HAMILTON
CUT!
TAMMI
But he won’t respond to me.
HAMILTON
Miss Whitlock, Amanda Guildford possesses at least some small measure of self respect!
TAMMI
Amanda loves Emery!
HAMILTON
...Yes (To Bob) You’ll have to respond to her a little. You are Emery and this is the woman who, since childhood, you’ve adored.
TAMMI
(Without waiting to be cued) Look at me, Emery – Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
25
JAMIE
Go thunder.
George makes thunder, waves to Emily as she enters to watch the rehearsal. TAMMI
- You know me. Put your arms around me , as you know you want to. Kiss me, Emery.
Bob kisses Tammi, forthrightly, but Tammi clings to his lips and won't let him go. HAMILTON
CUT! CUT! CUT! You are crawling on him like an anaconda.
EMILY
(blurts out) Not that he minds.
HAMILTON
Emily?
EMILY
Sorry, father. Excuse me.
Emily tries to exit. Bob detains her. BOB
Emily –
HAMILTON
People. If we cannot keep our personal feelings off the stage –
EMILY
Father’s right. You’re simply doing your work, I’m sure. I believe I’ll go now... and make myself useful to Mother.
Tammi observes with satisfaction as Emily exits. HAMILTON
If you, Miss Whitlock –
TAMMI
What?
HAMILTON
- cannot keep your personal feelings –
TAMMI
What then? Where would you be without me? I am the only one in this entire company with any professional acting experience.
HAMILTON
I'm warning you, you could go too far.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
26
TAMMI
I can quit, if that's what you want.
CALLY
Oh, no –
TAMMI
If you don't appreciate my artistry, I can certainly quit.
CALLY
No, no, no – would a professional do such a thing to the company the day before opening? I mean, Miss Whitlock who could possibly take your place?
BOB
Why are you in the Footlighters in the first place - since the rest of the company is obviously below your caliber.
TAMMI
You of all people, Bob Simpson, ought to know why I'm here on this spot on earth and no other - since you know what is in my heart. I’m certainly not here to practice art as I am probably the only person present with any artistic ability at all.
Hamilton clears his throat noisily and stalks out, followed by Cally. CALLY
Hamilton. Hamilton, dear boy - let's not cut off our nose to spite our face.
Hamilton growls. They exit. JAMIE
Now what?
TAMMI
Places. Places, everyone. We’ll have to carry on without director. Bob ‚your brother wrote me a letter.‛ Ivy. Miss Agatha! I can direct you.
BOB
No thanks. Rehearsal’s over – see you at dress rehearsal tonight everyone and let’s study your lines, shall we?
Jamie closes the book. Bob exits. Footlighters return to tasks costumes, scenery, etc. Nancy puts down her paintbrush. BESS
Where are you going?
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
27
Nancy puts her finger to her lips and points to indicate the hayloft. Bess and George follow her off, leaving Tammi alone on the stage. Lights up in hayloft Tammi isolated in light "onstage" below. TAMMI
(Melancholy, Rehearsing Alone) You know me. Put your arms around me, as you know you want to . . .
NANCY
(up in the loft) I’ll search here. Bess, will you check that corner?
GEORGE
Look at this.
BESS
What is it?
GEORGE
It’s a piece of cloth. Netting.
Nancy and Bess cross to George. Nancy takes out her spyglass to look at the cloth. NANCY
This isn’t just any netting. This is pink silk tulle – what they use in costumes for... ballerinas.
BESS
A ballerina puppet. (Nancy nods.)
TAMMI
Put your arms around me, as you know you want to. Kiss me, Emery.
Tom Tozzle steps onstage and takes Tammi roughly by the arm. Bess finds something else in the straw. TOM
Let's not forget why we’re here.
TAMMI
What? Let go of me .
BESS
Look at this!
NANCY
Shhh!
TOM
Why are w e h e r e ?
TAMMI
(Sulkily.) You tell me .
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
28
TOM
We're here to do a job, sister.
Bess sneezes. NANCY
(calls out) What job is that?
Tom quickly exits. TAMMI
Who's there? Who's spying on me? Is that you, Bob?
NANCY
Nancy Drew. What job?
TAMMI
Why, the job of acting... Not a job... a calling!
NANCY
Some people seem to be "acting‛ both on stage and off. What do you have there, Bess?
BESS
A slipper. A man’s bedroom slipper.
NANCY
Let’s have a closer look at that slipper. Is that a monogram?
Scene change begins, scene continues in voice over. GEORGE
E.C. . . . E.C. . . .
NANCY
Emmet Calhoun. Could it be? I like to think I’m a good judge of character and I judged him to be a gentleman not a prankster given to frightening people. I’ll have to speak to Emmet Calhoun.
SCENE EIGHT Evening. A rainstorm. Lights up in kitchen on Tom Tozzle in a rather effective wig, dress and chef’s apron, searching the upper cupboards of the kitchen. A pan smokes on the stove. Unseen by Tom, Cally observes him. Cally clears his throat, Tom goes quickly to an open cookbook and reads, following the lines of the recipe with a spoon, moving his lips as he reads. CALLY
You sure you’ve done this before, old girl?
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
29
Margo enters. MARGO
(Hesitant.) Madame?
Shakes his head sharply, waves her out. She exits. TOM
(French accent, through clenched teeth, to Cally.) Monsieur wishes to offer his assistance?
CALLY
(Reads cookbook over Tom's shoulder) ‚Take an egg. Break it.‛ That’s difficult? (Tom drops the spoon and grabs Cally by the throat.) Something’s burning!
Margo peeks in. MARGO
Madame?
Tom shrugs, claps a lid over the platter, gestures impatiently for Margo to enter. TOM
Oui, oui, oui.
MARGO
A little cold soup (Tom nods) Shrimps in aspic. French bread as only the French know how to bake it .
TOM MARGO
Oui, madame, et also: la fifi ala mode, la goop du jour, et also les pommes de terror. What?
TAMMI
Four star, madame. Le grand cuisine.
MARGO
The hour is growing late, Madame. The guests are waiting in the garden. Is Madame ready?
George, Bess and Nancy burst in . GEORGE
Cloudburst!
BESS
It’s raining, it’s pouring.
NANCY
I’m afraid our picnic is ruined, Mrs. Spencer. Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
30
MARGO
Here, children, sit down. (indicates table)
BESS
Besides, the garden’s all muddy.
NANCY
Someone seems to have dug it up.
MARGO
The gardener. He offered to put in a gardenia bush.
NANCY
How deep a hole does a gardenia require?
Emily and Bob enter. Margo hurriedly sets the table , assisted by Bess, George and Nancy. MARGO
Emily – come in, come in. Don’t get soaked, darling.
Margo lights the candles. Bob detains Emily for a moment. BOB
(aside) Really, Emily, Nothing’s changed – you’re the only girl for me. (Emily nods, uncertainly. He kisses her) Happy birthday, darling.
MARGO
Our guest of honor!
Hamilton enters, bearing presents. Tammi enters and slips into a chair beside Bob. TAMMI
(To Emily) Happy birthday, darling. (To the others.) You were expecting me, of course? Mr. Calhoun invited me.
CALLY
Did I? (Tammi glares at him) Of course. I certainly did.
MARGO
No trouble. We always set an empty place for Althea. Tammi can fill it.
A flash of lightening. Thunder. HAMILTON
My, that’s close.
GEORGE
(aside to audience) Coming from an afternoon of making fake rain and thunder, everything looked a little suspicious.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
31
BESS
(aside to audience) And we looked forward to something real – food. What is that smell?
TOM
Dinner, it is served.
He lifts the cover of the platter, grasps the ladle. Margo give a little shriek, and stops him. MARGO
What is this? It’s not edible.
TOM
It is what it is. It is to eat. C’est la vie.
MARGO
But what happened to the cold, smoked tongue? Where is the ratatouille?
TOM
I cook, but you will not eat? Mon dieu! Sacre bleu! Notre Dame! Le Sacre Au Printemps!
TAMMI
Perhaps she’s not yet acquainted with the kitchen.
TOM
True. Is true. Is so, so, so true.
EMILY
Well, it is her first day.
TOM
The pressure, it is terrible.
MARGO
Oh, Emily –
EMILY
Mother, it’s supposed to be a picnic, isn’t it? Do we have bread?
TOM
Non.
MARGO
Why not?
TOM
Saltine crackers. Ritz crackers. Graham crackers.
EMILY
All right – and cheese. I know we have cheese. (Tom nods) And apples. Like the French do.
TOM
Ah, oui. Oui. Ooo-la-la-la.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
32
EMILY
It’s be alright, mother.
TOM
(To Emily, heartfelt.) Merci, merci.
Bess and Cally bring out the bread, cheese and apples. Lights up in the hidden staircase where Bushy stands at an open fuse-box and fiddles with fuses. The lights in the kitchen dim and brighten. MARGO
Of course, dear. It’ll be great fun. And you’ll open your presents and –
HAMILTON
And any minute now –
Doorbell rings. Margo goes to answer. Hamilton stands and raises his glass. HAMILTON
Now then! Gentlemen. Ladies. I wish to make a little speech in honor of my lovely daughter Emily, on the evening of her eighteenth birthday. We know her to be kind, wise, gentle, faithful – and beyond the small gifts we give in her honor – her great Uncle saw fit to supply –
Margo enters with Carson Drew. Under his arm, he carries a box. HAMILTON
Mr. Drew. Good evening.
Nancy rushes to him and embraces him. NANCY
I didn’t know you were coming, Dad!
CARSON
Hello, sweetheart. (Presents the box to Emily.) Emily Spencer – as your Great Uncle Leander Van Pelt decreed, on the evening of your eighteenth birthday – his bequest.
HAMILTON
Emily’s diamonds.
Tom slides to the telephone. Lights up on Bushy, in the hollow wall, his hands in the fuse box, waiting for a signal. Tom starts to dial. Emily opens the lid. Light blasts out of the box. EMILY
So many - is it possible? Can they be real?
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
33
CARSON
Yes, certainly they are. Well, if you doubt it – as Nancy.
MARGO
Sit down, Mr. Drew. Join us for supper.
EMILY
Nancy? Can you tell us? Really?
GEORGE
Yes, she can.
CARSON
I’m afraid I must return to town.
HAMILTON
Well, we thank you, sir.
CARSON
Good night. (To Nancy) You’ll be careful?
NANCY
Always.
Carson exits. Nancy brings out her spyglass. NANCY
May I, Emily?
EMILY
Please!
Nancy examines the diamonds. Tom completes dialing. The phone rings once inside the hidden staircase. In the hollow wall, Bushy manipulates the fuses. NANCY
A jeweler taught me the trade. Yes, yes indeed. They’re quite real, Emily. Why, this is a fortune of diamonds!
A flash of lightening. Blackout. Something falls and breaks. Emily yelps. Dialogue continues in voice over. NANCY
What’s that?
MARGO
Emily?
EMILY
Right here, mother.
Running steps. A door opens and closes. Steps returning. BESS
Hypers! Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
34
GEORGE
It’s alright, Bess.
EMILY
I must have dropped my plate.
BOB
Get your hands off me, Tammi.
TAMMI
But, I’m afraid of the dark.
HAMILTON
Just stay where you are, everyone. The lights often do this in an electrical storm. They’ll be on again in a minute.
Stage right, the ballerina puppet floats into view. CALLY
Night and silence – who is here?
BESS
George, look. There it is. The puppet!
Nancy snaps on a flashlight and muffles the light with her hand. GEORGE
Holy cats!
MARGO
Althea?
A second puppet floats into view, the witch whose head we glimpsed earlier in the loft. GEORGE
Gadzooks! It’s a witch.
HAM I LTON
Puppets. More fool puppets!
NANCY
I’m going to get a closer look.
BESS
Nancy don't!
Nancy crosses the yard toward the puppets. The others follow a few steps behind. As Nancy advances the puppets retreat. Abruptly Nancy turns to the others and takes her hand off the flashlight beam. NANCY
What about the diamonds? Who’s watching the diamonds?
Footsteps. Door opening and closing. Confusion. Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
35
MARGO
I can’t find them anywhere. Hamilton!
HAMlLTON
The diamonds! Emily’s diamonds are gone!
Sound of a car motor starting up NANCY
Too late! Or maybe not. Let’s go!
GEORGE
Wait for us!
SCENE NINE Sound of car doors opening and closing. A second motor starts up. Lights up on the roadster, in dense fog. Nancy at the wheel. GEORGE
The thief has such a head start on us.
NANCY
Can’t go any faster or we’ll break the law. Good thing the rain’s stopped. Easier to see.
BESS
What’s that?
GEORGE
A car behind us. Gaining on us and we’re doing the limit.
NANCY
We’re being followed. I’m pulling over. Get the top down. Hurry.
Sound of the second car approaching. BESS
Grab that corner, George. Now pull. That’s it.
GEORGE
Good work, Bess!
BESS
I know my way around convertibles.
NANCY
It’s not much protection, but it’s better than nothing. Grab your flashlights.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
36
GEORGE
Got mine.
NANCY
Here’s yours, Bess.
Sound of this motor cutting off; car doors opening and closing. BESS
They’re stopped. They’re getting out.
NANCY
Flashlights at the ready! Crouch down, everyone.
Tom and Bushy, masked and hooded, approach the car. GEORGE
Son of a biscuit. They’re letting the air out of the tires.
TOM
Roll down your windows – I want to talk to you.
BUSHY
We can see you plain as day. Get up off the floor.
NANCY
What do you want?
BUSHY
Open the door.
TOM
We just want a little chat.
Nancy leans on the horn. She, Bess, and George click their flashlights on and shine them at the goons. NANCY
Who are you?
BUSHY
Gonna kill us with flashlights?
Tom and Bushy laugh. TOM
So you don’t want to be chummy? All right. Your game’s up. We tried to live and let live, Nancy Drew, but you’ve become a nuisance. And now, what’s to stop us from getting’ ya?
BUSHY
A flimsy piece of canvas. Where’s your knife, Tom?
TOM
(Cleans his thumbnail with his knife.) I’m using it. Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
37
BUSHY
Give it here.
TOM
Use your own.
GEORGE
Let me out. I’ll use my judo on ‘em.
NANCY
No, George. There’s two of them, and maybe others.
Offstage, a racket of angry voices, approaching. TOM
Make it snappy.
Sound of tearing canvas. Flashlights shine on knife blades. BESS
A knife!!
GEORGE
Oh, hypers.
NANCY
Sit tight, Bess.
BESS
Oh, Nancy, another knife!
GEORGE
I’m getting out. I’m going to judo chop ‘em.
NANCY
No, George, sit tight!
Hamilton, Cally and Tammi approach from a distance. CALLY
THIS IS A JOB FOR THE POLICE!
HAMILTON
POLICE. I’LL SHOW YOU POLICE!
BUSHY
Cheeze it – the cops!
Tom and Bushy withdraw their knives and exit. CALLY
Who’s there?
TAMMI
What’s that?
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
38
Sound of a car starting up, peeling out. HAMI LTON
It’s Nancy Drew's roadster.
Nancy, Bess and George get out of the roadster. NANCY
You came at an opportune moment. They nearly sliced the convertible top completely open.
GEORGE
You okay, Bess?
BESS
Of course I’m okay. I just don’t favor knives in my face.
TAMMI
Knives? Did you say knives! First ghosts. Now, razor-sharp knives?!
CALLY
Now, Tammi. Don’t upset yourself.
HAMILTON
Please go home, Tammi. You have to open a show tomorrow.
TAMMI
Open a show? My nerves are shattered. I’m completely shattered. How can I possibly go on stage? I must get away to a safe place! We must all –
CALLY
I could escort you, dear girl. Take you safely anywhere you’d like to go. Anywhere in the world.
TAMMI
But not just you and I – the others. Everyone, everyone must go away. We must all leave this terrifying place!
HAMILTON
If I might remind you, Tammi dear, an audience has bought tickets to our opening performance tomorrow night and unless someone is prepared to pay back all the tickets, the show must go on, terror or no.
TAMMI
Well, I’ll tell you something, Mr. Director. I quit. I QUIT! And when the others hear what I’ve done, they’ll do the same, I promise you.
She rides off on the bicycle. Cally runs after her.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
39
CALLY
Tammi! Tammi! Wait for me!
Blackout.
SCENE TEN Lights up in the yard as the Footlighters assemble there. OTTO
Where's the director?
PHYLLIS
Could he forget it’s –
OTTO & PHYLLIS
- dress rehearsal?
JAMIE
Of course not. He’ll be here.
YVONNE
Here he is.
JAMIE
Here he is. From the top – places everyone.
Hamilton, Nancy, George, Bess, Emily and Bob enter. HAMILTON
Forget places. I’ve an announcement, fellow thespians. Tammi Whitlock has quit the company. (Footlighters exclaim and groan.) What will we do? I have absolutely no idea. Could you possibly take her place Ivy?
BOB
No.
YVONNE
Oh, no. She can’t even remember he own lines.
HAMILTON
Oh, dear. We have to open tomorrow night. Tickets are sold. People are coming.
BESS
I’ve a suggestion. It just so happens that Nancy Drew –
NANCY
No, Bess. Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
40
BESS
- is an excellent actress.
GEORGE
Yes, you are , Nancy.
NANCY
I’m on a case.
HAMILTON
With all due respect for Nancy’s many talents, I can’t see how anyone can learn a major role overnight with a single rehearsal.
NANCY
Hmm. Well – (As Amanda) I came as soon as I heard. Heart that the train had brought you home for your poor mother’s funeral. Won’t you speak to me, Emery? Won’t you look at me? I want to comfort you – poor heartbroken soldier boy – (As Emery) I’m a man now, Amanda, not a fool boy. (As Amanda) Have your feelings toward me so changed? Oh, this awful, ugly war! (As Emery) Your brother wrote me a letter. (As Amanda) Oh, but you must not believe my brother.
BOB
(Overjoyed) Leave us alone, Agatha!
NANCY
No, that’s my line.
Bob impulsively grabs Nancy and kisses her. Nancy pushes him away. NANCY
The kiss isn’t for twelve more lines. (To Emily) Don’t worry. Purely professional.
Tammi enters. HAMILTON
Well, Nancy, the role is yours, if you’ll take it.
NANCY
Well . . . alright.
TAMM I
I beg your pardon. What role?
BOB
The role of Amanda Guilford!
TAMMI
I am playing Amanda.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
41
IVY
But you quit.
TAMMI
Who says?
GEORGE
I heard you say you quit.
TAMMI
Who are you? Nothing but the catspaw of Nancy Drew.
GEORGE
Well, Bess here is an undying fan of yours, Tammi, and she’ll say the same. Bess?
BESS
You’re really a great actress, Tammi. But you did say you quit. And besides, Nancy’s even better.
TAMMI
She’s no actress. Nancy who? Nancy Drew, Girl Detective. Who are you investigating this time? Him? Her/ Me?
HAMILTON
Too late for all that. If you haven’t quit, you’re fired.
TAMMI
You can’t fire me.
HAMILTON
I just did.
TAMMI
That’s what you think. You think I am dispensable? You think you can put me out with the cat? You think you can cast me off like trash? Well, you are sadly mistaken. You’re about to discover, Hamilton Spencer, that Tammi Whitlock cannot be fired! (Exits)
HAMILTON
There will be no rehearsal tonight. I want you all to go home, get extra sleep, and try to keep your imaginations from running wild because of threats, quittings, firings or silly pranks with puppets. Is that clear? Nancy, may I have a word?
Footlighters mutter assent, go off. GEORGE
(Aside To Bess) Come with me to the kitchen.
BESS
To the kitchen? Okay!
GEORGE
Not to snitch food. I’ve got an idea! Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
42
George and Bess exit. Lights tight on Nancy and Hamilton. He produces a small bell. Rings it . NANCY
A bell?
HAMILTON
Do you think it would wake you, if you were sleeping soundly?
NANCY
Certainly.
HAMILTON
I’ve rigged a rope so I can ring the bell outside your room if I should need to wake you. Just hook it on the rope outside your door. Go on to bed – you’ll need your strength for the performance.
NANCY
Alright. Thanks.
HAMILTON
They’ve never come twice in one night.
NANCY
Even fiendish puppeteers have to sleep sometime.
Lights up on Bushy in Nancy's bedroom, fuddling with the window frame with crowbar and saw. A girl’s voice can be heard, humming. Bushy dives under the bed as Nancy comes in. Humming to herself, she lays out a dress, socks and shoes on a chair. NANCY
(To audience) I did intend to sleep that night – I was simply done to a frazzle: puppets, stolen diamonds, a slashed convertible, an uproar at the theater – separate incidents? Or could they all be part of one big scheme? I would go to bed – but no sense in being unprepared. A simple dress to pull over my head, socks and clean white sneakers, should the night prove eventful. (Takes toothbrush out of suitcase.) Floss two minutes, brush three.
Nancy leaves the room with her robe, night gown and toothbrush. Pulling the door closed behind her. Bushy comes out of hiding, collects his tools, takes the dress, shoes and socks Nancy has laid out, the keys to the room, and exits. Nancy returns to find the door ajar. She checks the room, and finding no one, relaxes. Offstage, Margo screams. Nancy rushes to the door, finds herself lock in and moves to the window. As she presses against the window to get a closer look, the window pops out, frame and all, and Nancy falls. Sound: a tremendous crash as the window hits the grounds and shatters. Blackout on Nancy, mid-air. END OF ACT ONE. Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
43
ACT TWO: SCENE ONE Insistent ringing of Nancy’s warning bell. Lights up on Nancy, now clinging to the trellis below her window. MARGO
The ghost has come for Emily! No! No! She’s attacking Emily!
HAMILTON
Lights – turn on the yard lights! Could the infernal lights come for once when we need them?
NANCY
(To herself.) I can’t... hang on... forever. I’ll have to... utilize... my rock climbing skills...
The ballerina puppet floats into view, stage right. The bell rings, more urgently. The witch puppet floats into view following the ballerina. Hamilton comes out into the yard. Margo calls to him from the doorway. MARGO
Don’t go out – it’s not safe – Hamilton –
HAMILTON
Nancy Drew? Where is she?
NANCY
Here.
Simultaneously, a disembodied voice answers, with only a passing resemblance to Nancy’s. VOICE
I’m here, Mr. Spencer.
HAMILTON
Where?
George and Bess, in their nighties, join Hamilton in the yard. NANCY
(Carefully) Up here.
GEORGE
Look!
Hamilton jumps and Bess yelps as a new puppet floats into view: a puppet that looks like Nancy Drew and wears the dress, socks and sneakers Nancy set out at the end of Act One. There’s a rope around the Nancy Puppet’s neck. The witch jerks her forward. The three puppets advance.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
44
BESS
Nancy! They’ve got Nancy!
Margo screams as the ballerina chases her and Emily. NANCY
...go to... utilize... my rock climbing skills...
GEORGE
What? Nancy?
George spots Nancy on the trellis and rushes to her, dragging Bess along. BESS
And now they’re coming for us!
GEORGE
Shush. Hold on, Nancy. We’re here.
BESS
Two Nancies. I’ll faint.
GEORGE
No you won’t, Bess. Give me an assist here. Can you step down on our shoulders, Nancy? We’ll hold you.
NANCY
Thanks!
BESS
(Shrieks) Nancy – it’s you! She’s wearing your dress!
They all fall in a heap. The three puppets float closer. MARGO
Get inside! You girls – get to safety –
George, Bess and Nancy back away. The ballerina floats to the Nancy puppet and kicks her. The Nancy puppet screams. The witch puppet flies to the Nancy puppet, wraps the rope around her neck and throttles her. Screaming intensifies, and gargling and choking. The Nancy puppet gives a death cry, goes limp, slips from the witch’s clutches and falls, hanging from the rope. MARGO
Police! Police! I’m calling the police!
Hooded figures rush about, mutter, and drag things. Two flashlights snap on: Hamilton and Nancy, advancing. The Hoods curse, drop the Nancy puppet and exit. NANCY
George! Bess! Look after Margo and Emily!
Hamilton and Nancy approach the puppet. Lights come on in the kitchen. Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
45
HAMILTON
See? A life-sized marionette.
NANCY
So it is. But where are the strings?
HAMILTON
You’re right. No strings.
NANCY
I wonder how it works. Very life like.
HAMILTON
But definitely wooden.
NANCY
With some sort of metal hinge at each joint.
MARGO
(on the phone in the kitchen) Yes, you heard me correctly, we’re being attacked by puppets! I don’t care to argue. You’re sending a policeman? Well, send him now! (hangs up)
George and Bess hurry out to join Hamilton and Nancy. Margo and Emily hover at the kitchen door. HAMILTON
It’s all over. Everyone, to bed.
GEORGE
(indicates puppet) What’ll we do with it?
NANCY
Bring it inside.
GEORGE
I can carry it myself, sir.
BESS
(helping carry the puppet) Let somebody help you for once, George.
They carry the puppet into the kitchen. Nancy indicates they should lay it on the table. Flashing lights and a siren. ALL
The police!
Police Chief McGinnis enters the kitchen. MCGINNIS
What’s all this in the middle of the night?
NANCY
Chief McGinnis!
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
46
MCGINNIS
(to audience) – of River Heights Precinct. Respected Police Chief, secure enough in his own reputation to accept assistance from amateurs such as Nancy Drew! (To Margo) I beg your pardon, I didn’t know Miss Drew was involved.
MARGO
Involved?! She was nearly murdered!
HAMILTON
(aside) Margo.
Police Chief McGinnis sighs, takes out his spiral notebook. Nancy gives evidence as Hamilton leads Margo to the table to view the puppet. NANCY
Well, first and foremost, there’s been the theft of diamonds –
Nancy and McGinnis continue in an undertone. HAMILTON
A puppet. Wood and hinges. You see? Not Althea’s ghost.
MARGO
No. But this is worse!
HAMILTON
No, it’s better. Ghosts are of another world. Puppets are of this world, so there’s an explanation. Must be. Please, Margo – go to bed.
MARGO
Forgive me, Hamilton – how can I sleep – thinking we may be murdered in our beds by puppets!
HAMILTON
Emily, go to bed and lock yourself in. (To Margo) Do go along. I’ll be there in a moment, darling.
MARGO
Emily?
Margo and Emily exit. Nancy returns to her inspection of the puppet. GEORGE
(indicating puppet) Nancy, this is your dress!
BESS
Creepers! How will you ever wear it again?
NANCY
Oh, wash it, I’d think, and give it a press.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
47
HAMILTON
Girls, I think you’d best go to bed. The excitement is over for tonight.
GEORGE
Don’t worry, Nancy. The mystery’s practically solved. All you have to find out is when and where and did what and why.
George and Bess exit. MCGINNIS
Well. If I have all the facts, I am ready to draw my conclusions.
NANCY
Yes?
MCGINNlS
Someone is annoyed with you, Nancy.
NANCY
But why?
MCGINNIS
Can’t say for sure, but you’ve put quite a few people behind bars. You might think of your own safely. You might go home.
NANCY
What about the diamonds? And this frightened family?
MCGINNIS
Right. I’ll put a call into the station and tell them I’m staying. No one will harm Nancy Drew while I’m on the premises.
NANCY
Thanks, Chief. (studying the puppet) I don’t see quite how she works – but see here, Mr. Spencer – there’s a metal plate – (indicates the base of the puppet’s spine)
The police chief leans against a wall and goes to sleep. HAMILTON
- And here’s another. (indicates the small of the neck)
Nancy puts her hand on the puppet's shoulder. A door in the puppet's chest flies open. NANCY
Look! An empty chamber.
Hamilton puts his hand on the puppet’s other shoulder, with the same result. HAMILTON
And another.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
48
NANCY
It’s not just a puppet, it’s a storage chest. And not quite empty. What’s this? (Lifts something out of the chest.) A jewel of some kind.
HAMILTON
One of Emily’s diamonds?
NANCY
I don’t think so. (Takes out her spyglass, studies the jewel.) Green. An emerald. And here’s a tiny, perfect ruby.
HAMILTON
I don’t understand.
NANCY
Nor I. But a dim idea is forming in my mind. Perhaps we should sleep on it. Would you put these in your safe?
HAMILTON
Yes. Goodnight, then. (To the chief) You’ll see Nancy to her room? Chief? Police Chief McGinnis?
MCGINNIS
(awakens with a start) Hmph? What? Oh. Right. I won’t let her out of my sight.
HAMILTON
Right. (He exits)
NANCY
Just one more moment.
Chief foes to sleep again. Nancy lifts the puppet to sitting position in a chair, chin on elbow, elbow resting on table. Nancy sits down across the corner of the table, gazes at the puppet, copying the pose. After a moment, she gets up and puts the puppet away in the broom closet. Tom enters in his Madame Chef get up. He spots Chief McGinnis and freezes. NANCY
Isn’t it a bit late for cooking?
TOM
Mais, non. Bread must be baked in the night.
NANCY
You don’t say?
Tom nervously gets out tar flour canister, opens it, dusts his hands with flour. Lights down.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
49
ACT TWO: SCENE TWO Morning. Lights up In the kitchen on bushy and tom in his chef disguise, renewing their search of the kitchen. TOM
Blueboy’s here.
BUSHY
What?
TOM
Guarding Nancy Drew.
BUSHY
Uncle Fuzz. We gotta scram. Hurry up and find that fourth puppet.
TOM
You find it, jinglebrains – you know where it is. (Bushy ‘searches’ in the refrigerator) Why don’t you try the butter dish.
BUSHY
It’s gotta be in the barn.
TOM
We done the barn.
BUSHY
Then it’s gotta be in the yard.
TOM
You’re the gardener – keep digging.
BUSHY
Look, we got the kid’s diamonds – let’s blow.
TOM
Diamonds nothing – we want the big loot.
BUSHY
But where is it?
TOM
Look, we found the diary in the hay loft. It says there are four puppets. Therefore, the loot is in the fourth puppet. And we’re not leaving til we find it. (Sound of a girl’s voice, crying) Other people may be leaving.
BUSHY
(Mock sympathy) Aw –
TOM
Now, scram!
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
50
Sound of crying gets louder. Bushy and Tom rapidly put the kitchen back together. Tom reaches into the oven, takes out a misshapen loaf, bangs it on the table. The two crooks exit as Emily enters, dabbing at her eyes with a handkerchief. She sighs, gets out a knife and tries to cut the bread. George and Bess enter. BESS
What’s cooking, Emily? Can we pitch in?
GEORGE
I’ll start the coffee... (Notices Emily’s sniffling) Is anything wrong – I mean, besides last night? (Emily shakes her head)
BESS
What are you making?
EMILY
Sandwiches.
BESS
(comes closer) Sandwiches. For breakfast? (Emily sobs)
GEORGE
It’s okay. You can have sandwiches for breakfast.
BESS
You can have anything you like. You’re an heiress.
EMILY
But I’m not –
GEORGE
What?
EMILY
Because I'm going to leave. Now. This very morning.
GEORGE
Wait. Emily, will you just wait a minute?
EMILY
No.
GEORGE
At least tell Nancy.
EMILY
She wouldn’t understand. She’s brave – not a coward like me – she’s talented –
Nancy enters. NANCY
Why, Emily, you are very brave. You’ve been carrying the weight of the whole perplexing disturbance on your shoulders.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
51
EMILY
But I’m not perplexed, I’m frightened. And you – you’re so very talented and I’m dull. I can’t act –
NANCY
You’ve never been allowed to.
BESS
What about Bob? He loves you, Emily – and he’s so handsome and everything –
EMILY
I have nothing to offer Bob. Nothing but the diamonds and now they’re gone. They weren’t insured, Nancy.
BESS
I’m sure Bob loves you for yourself.
EMILY
And what am I? Nothing. I don’t do anything but hold my parents like a heavy anchor to this dreadful spot. I’m going. Don’t anyone try to stop me or I’ll – I’ll do something desperate!
NANCY
Listen, Emily. Of course you’d think of running away. And if that’s what you really wish to do, I’ll help you. But first I want to ask something of you. Give me till midnight to solve this mystery. And you can help.
EMILY
How?
BESS
Nancy, remember you promised – you have to learn the play for tonight. You have to go on stage.
NANCY
(To Emily) Help me learn my lines. Stay close beside me. Can you do that? Just for today? (Emily nods.)
ACT TWO: SCENE THREE Backstage, Barn Theater, that afternoon. A buzzing hive of activity as the Footlighters rush to finish the set, lighting, sound and costumes. Phyllis checks the hem of Ivy’s costume. Bess and Yvonne put the finishing touches on a flat when Otto walks by, holding one end of a heavy piece of scenery; Ulric on the other end. Jamie instructs George in making thunder. PHYLLIS
How did you get all this mud on your hem? Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
52
IVY
Fell in a hole in the yard. That new gardener is digging all these holes.
PHYLLIS
Well, stay in the barn when you’re in costume.
OTTO
Don’t drop it. No time to build a new one.
YVONNE
Don’t touch – wet paint.
OTTO
(looking at the smear of paint on his butt) Dagnabbit!
JAMIE
A rumble. Not a crash crash crash.
GEORGE
Atta girl, George.
Onstage, Nancy rehearses her blocking with Bob. Emily, script in hand, sits coaching from the ‘wings’. Chief McGinnis stands in attendance, arms across his chest, fast asleep, snoring. Lights fade up in the loft on Cally, poking about in the straw. EMILY
You drop your glove –
NANCY
- here – and cross down –
EMILY
He ignores it –
NANCY
- I pick it up again – ‚Oh, dear‛ –
Cally feels under a bale of way, can't find what he's looking for. CALLY
Oh, no!
As Cally exclaims. The police chief lets out a loud snore and wares himself up. EMILY
‚- how clumsy of me!‛
NANCY
‚How clumsy of me!‛
Police Chief goes to sleep again. Nancy hands Emily the glove, puts her finger to her lips, gestures for Emily to carry on with the scene, and exits. Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
53
EMILY
Then, let’s see, you go to the window, Nancy, and look out at the sunset and say, ‚Even when we were tiny children, you said one day you would marry me.‛ Then, Nancy, you cross here, and your line continues, ‚And I scoffed at your promise, Emery, but you said –‚
Bob steps up beside Emily. BOB
‚Believe me, Amanda, when we’re grown, we will marry.‛ What are you doing?
EMILY
(Indicates Police Chief, puts her finger to her lips.) And then, Nancy –
BOB
You sit in his lap.
Bob pulls Emily out of her chair, sits down and pulls her into his lap. Emily looks around to see if anyone has seen. EMILY
Bob !
BOB
We’re to be married, aren’t we? Well, aren’t we?
EMILY
(refusing to meet his eye) Oh, you kiss everybody.
Crossfade to hayloft. Nancy enters the loft as Cally renews his search. NANCY
Looking for something?
CALLY
What!?!
NANCY
Diamonds, perhaps?
CALLY
I beg your pardon?
NANCY
(produces slipper from her pocket) Initials ‘E.C.’ Would that be Emmet Calhoun?
CALLY
Where did you find that?
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
54
NANCY
Right here in the barn. Do you sleep up here?
CALLY
Of course not.
NANCY
You know more than you’re telling me. What are you looking for?
Emily drops her playbook. Nancy and Cally freeze. The hidden telephone rings in the barn. NANCY
Go on. I’ve been looking for a telephone.
Bushy enters the stage right and answers the phone. BUSHY
I know you want your dingbusted delivery. Hold your hot dogs. You’ll get what you were promised.
He slams down the phone and exits. CALLY
I am not a thief, Miss Drew. I have no interest in Emily’s fortune. My weakness is for...
NANCY
A pretty face? Tammi?
CALLY
Is it so obvious? I know she’s rude and selfish, but I’m bewitched.
NANCY
You arranged to meet her here?
CALLY
Meet me? Never. She has no interest in this old fool. But I could sometimes interest her in – well, the same thing that interests you. Secrets about this estate. Up here in the loft I found... it’s gone! Someone’s taken it!
NANCY
What?
CALLY
The diary. The diary of Leander Van Pelt.
NANCY
Emily’s Great Uncle.
CALLY
Oh, Nancy, I should have told you all this sooner, but Tammi made me promise to keep the diary a secret.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
55
NANCY
You read it?
CALLY
Parts of it. It mentions the puppets and a fortune in jewels.
NANCY
The diamonds.
CALLY
Not only diamonds, but emeralds, rubies, sapphires and more, if you care about that sort of thing.
NANCY
Well, some people do.
C ALLY
What interested me were the drawings. On the cover of the diary, Van Pelt had drawn four figures. Last night it was like seeing the drawings come to life. Those puppets in the yard matched the drawings almost precisely.
NANCY
A ballerina, a witch...
CALLY
And a milkmaid with a striking resemblance to you, Nancy.
Nancy examines the cover with her spyglass. NANCY
And the fourth figure?
CALLY
A sort of clown or jester, a figure we call Harlequin.
NANCY
We haven’t seen him yet. (aside) I dare say, the thieves haven’t either. (To Cally) You build costumes, don’t you, Mr. Calhoun? Could you construct a costume that would match Harlequin?
CALLY
Of course.
NANCY
Great. We’re going to bait a trap. You may have no interest in Emily’s fortune, Cally, but I’ll wager someone does. Tonight Harlequin is going to draw the thieves into the limelight of I’m not Nancy Drew.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
56
ACT TWO: SCENE FOUR Lights up in the kitchen. George peeks in. GEORGE
All clear.
Bess leads Carson and Ned into the kitchen. CARSON
Where's Nancy?
GEORGE
You can’t see her ‘til tonight. She doesn’t know we invited you –
BESS
- and she’ll kill us if she finds out.
NED
Why?
GEORGE
Oh, she’s all preoccupied with the mystery –
BESS
- and getting ready to go on stage –
CARSON
Is she safe?
BESS
Chief McGinnis is guarding her.
Chief McGinnis enters, perturbed. MCGINNIS
Carson Drew! (offers his hand)
CARSON
Chief McGinnis. Where’s Nancy?
He raises a finger knowingly and makes a quick exit. Nancy enters. CARSON & NED
Nancy!
Nancy hugs Carson, then turns to Ned, allows him to kiss her on the cheek. NANCY
Hello, Dad. Hi, Ned. What are you doing out here?
CARSON
Did I hear you fell out your window?
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
57
NANCY
Clumsy.
CARSON
Truthfully?
NANCY
...Inobservant, anyway. But you haven’t told me what you’re doing out here.
NED
We couldn’t miss your stage debut.
NANCY
Bess! George!
Cally appears in the doorway. CALLY
Psst! Nancy!
GEORGE
Saved by the bell!
NANCY
If you’ll excuse me, I have to see about a costume.
CARSON
Don’t explain. We’ll see you at the show.
GEORGE
Come on. Bess and I’ll show you around the place.
George, Bess, Ned and Carson exit. Cally unfurls the finished costume, holds it up in front of him. CALLY
Ta-da! A costume for a Harlequin which matches the puppet in the diary!
NANCY
Bravo, Cally! Now to see if it fits... (Opens the broom closet) It’s gone! The puppet’s gone.
CALLY
Oh, Nancy, this is dreadful. Our plan’s ruined.
NANCY
Unless you can carve a puppet.
CALLY
Wait. I’ve got it. I’m a little rusty but – help me put this on. (they put the costume on him)
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
58
NANCY
It fits. Great. Now, tonight at the performance, you keep hidden and then when I whistle – (whistles) – you take center stage. We’ll draw the thieves out if they think you’re the fourth puppet.
C ALLY
In the old days, I could make myself... anything – (begins to move like a puppet) – soft, harsh, rigid, limber, ancient, fresh, tender, cruel –
Lights tight on Cally, starting to dance. Scene shift begins. First he’s merely an accurate wooden puppet, then as he recalls his former glory on stage, his dance becomes something more.
ACT TWO: SCENE FIVE Backstage at the Barn Theater. Actors and crew rustling about. JAMIE
Quiet! Could I ask everyone to clear the stage, please –
EMILY
Jamie! Nancy’s costumes! We can’t find it anywhere!
MARGO
We can’t find Nancy’s costume! You must hold the curtain!
Actors and crew freeze ‘onstage.’ Lights up in the loft. Bushy fiddles with the levers of the puppet control box. TOM
Everything in working order?
BUSHY
Yes, of course. Everything with this control box is thoroughly rehearsed.
TOM
Okay. Alright. Okay.
BUSHY
Where is our lovely assistant?
TOM
Around someplace. We’ll go in a minute, once the seats are filled. We’ll give ‘em a show they won’t forget.
Nancy crosses the stage. Police Chief McGinnis meets her, coming from another direction, and takes her by the arm.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
59
MCGINNIS
There you are, young lady.
NANCY
Now, Chief, I want you to go sit in the audience. I’m perfectly safe back here with my friends and I’m preparing a special surprise for you.
MCGINNIS
I don’t like surprises.
NANCY
Trust me on this, Chief. Take a seat. We’re going to need you.
MCGINNIS
Alright, but I’m not letting you out of my sight.
Chief exits. Margo and Ivy hurry to Nancy with the Agatha costume. Nancy slips it on and Margo ties the sash. MARGO
You must have some sort of costume, darling. In the theater, we make do. Let’s see... why, it fits you!
NANCY
Lucky for me you’re just my size, Ivy.
MARGO
It’s not perfect, but it’ll do.
IVY
Do I go on in just my petticoats?
EMILY
Mother . . . do you think... the apron?
MARGO
Yes, tie your apron this way and don’t turn your back on the audience.
JAMIE
Places, everyone. (Motions for the backdrop to fly in.) House to half. Go music. Go rain. House out.
Lights up on Bob Simpson on ‘Stage’ in front of the curtains. BOB
‘Love and Death in Old Sewanee’ – A drama in two acts by Mirabella Charlatan.
He steps behind the curtains. The curtains open.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
60
BOB
Dreadful days in old Sewanee. War was raging – what Yankees liked to call ‘Civil War’ – what we knew to be The War of Northern Aggression. Winter was coming on, Mother was deathly ill and then, the week before I was to marry my darling Amanda, I was summoned to my duty as a soldier.
Nancy enters as Amanda. NANCY
Emery, is it true?
BOB
You've heard, Amanda?
NANCY
That Sherman’s marching through Georgia – burning, looting – and no one will stop him?
Tammi appears in the wings, hides herself. ROB
No one? ... I will.
NANCY
Oh, Emery - as a soldier?!
Tammi rushes on. TAMMI
Emery, you must be beside yourself. Consorting with the hired help! Have you forgotten who you are?
BOB
(struggles to get around Tammi) I’ve been called to my duty.
TAMMI
I am a sensitive Southern girl. I would never rush you, but really –
BOB
- I must go, Amanda.
TAMMI
Look at her clothes! She’s the housemaid!
NANCY
If you must go, Emery
TAMMI
I am your Amanda. It’s to me you will be married – stand aside, Agatha.
Ivy, miscued, enters as Agatha. Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
61
IVY
You called for Agatha?
Realizing her mistake, Ivy turns her back, exposing petticoats, then trying to cover up with her big apron, to no avail. She hurries off. TAMMI
I said, stand aside, Agatha!
NANCY
Whoever you are, I will not allow you to spoil the evening!
TAMMI
Spoil the evening? I’ll spoil your face for you.
Tammi lunges for Nancy, but cannot get to her because of the hooped skirt. Nancy tries to push her away with similar results. Nancy manages to grab Tammi by the wrists. TAMMI
Let go! You dirtbag! Ratface! Let go of me!
JAMIE
(Desperate) Go, lightening. Thunder.
TAMMI
Now you’re gonna suffer!
Blackout. Lights up. Nancy and Tammi are gone. Curtains close. Margo steps out through the curtains. MARGO
(Addressing the ‘Audience’) Ladies and gentlemen, we’re experiencing a bit of technical difficulty backstage. Will you do us the very great honor and favor of waiting in your seats ‘til we can continue? Hamilton?!
Lights up in the hidden staircase. Tammi drags Nancy down the stairs, bound hand and foot. Tom and Bushy step in through a panel. TOM
(To Tammi) Where have you been?
BUSHY
In the play with loverboy.
TOM
Leave her be. Look what she brought us.
TAMMl
Nancy Drew, trussed like a pig.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
62
BUSHY
Well, that’s nice.
NANCY
(To Tom) I recognize you now. The fake Madame Chef – no wonder the food was garbage. You’re the notorious Tom Tozzle. And you’re not Tammi Whitlock at all – you’re Tammi Tozzle, his infamous sister, briefly an actress, ever a villain – you’re Tom and Tammi Tozzle!
TAMMI
And what if we are? Yeah, I'm Tammi Tozzle.
TOM
(to audience) ‚Orphaned at birth with her brother, she took to stealing on the streets, refusing any offer of decent work, preferring quick wealth and the lonely path of the wanderer; and gifted as a perfect mimic, she was at one moment or another, a princess, a first lady, a famous singer –
TAMMI
- a temporary secretary –
NANCY
(to audience) In my father’s office!
BUSHY
Shut up!
TOM
I ain’t ashamed of what we are. Yeah, I’m Tom Tozzle. (TO AUDIENCE) ‚Orphaned at birth with his sister, what did he owe the world that gave him nothing but a good, swift kick into the cold? Gifted as a perfect mimic, he was at one time or other a professor, an investment banker –
TAMMI
- a French chartreuse –
TOM
- even an agent of the FBI!
BUSHY
Keep it to yourself.
NANCY
And you’re Bushy Trott. The most brutal beast to ever show his face in River Heights –
TAMMI
That’s right. That’s who he is.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
63
TOM & TAMM I
C'mon, Bushy. "Orphaned at birth – ‚
BUSHY
You ain’t tellin’ ‘em squat.
NANCY
I know what you’re looking for.
TOM
And I finally figured out where it is.
BUSHY
Then what are we talking to her for? Pick up your book.
TOM
We don’t need it. I got it mesmerized. (Taps his head.)
Bushy gags Nancy. The crooks exit. Nancy struggles, frees a hand and reaches for the diary. She reads briefly and studies the control box as lights go down on her. Lights up ‘onstage’ from the backstage perspective. Confusion reigns. MARGO
Attention, everyone. We must pull together! We cannot leave the audience sitting there. We must give them some kind of performance! Where’s Nancy?
YVONNE
She’s disappeared.
MARGO
Hamilton!
HAMILTON
Well, where’s Tammi? Since she’s ruined the play, the least she can do is finish her performance. Call places. Where’s a script? I’ll go on as Amanda myself.
JAMIE
Places.
HAMILTON
And bring in that blasted drop!
ULRICH
It’s stuck, sir.
HAMILTON
Well, we’re going on.
Margo hands Hamilton a script.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
64
BOB
It was bleak midwinter when I returned. I had failed to defeat General Sherman and now, poor mother was dead.
HAMILTON
What's he doing. He's jumped forward.
BOB
Poor mother was dead.
HAMILTON & MARGO
He’s skipped three scenes.
BOB
Poor mother was dead!
Lights up in the hayloft on Tammi and Tom. Tammi holding the ballerina puppet, Tom holding the witch and the milkmaid – ready to launch them into the air above the heads of the ‘audience’. Lights up in the hidden staircase. Nancy, upside-down as before. Bushy at the control box, frantically pulling the levers as he watches the loft through a peephole in the staircase. TAMMI
What’d you drag me up here for? You know I’m scared of heights!
TOM
You wanna know where the big loot it? It’s in the stage, under the floorboards. All we have to do is clear the theater.
TAMMI
Can’t we just yell ‘Fire!’?
TOM
We don’t want the Fire Department! We’re gonna fly these dummies out into the theater. The dummies always scared them before – always made them run and scream. Get ready to launch. Now!
TAMMI
No power.
BUSHY
(Frantic at the control box) It’s not sparking.
TOM
Now! ...Would jinglebrains give us some power? ...Zip. Zero. Nothing.
Emily steps into the wings in Nancy’s costume. HAMILTON
No! Emily –
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
65
MARGO
Your inheritance!
HAMILTON
You’ll lose your inheritance! You musn’t go on!
EMILY
Yes, Father. I must. (Brushes past him and steps ‘Onstage’) I came as soon as I heard, Emery. (Crosses to Bob, and puts her hand on his shoulder.)
BOB
Emily? Emily!
EMILY
Amanda.
BOB
Oh. Well, don’t touch me, Amanda.
EMILY
But I want to comfort you – poor, heartbroken solider boy.
BOB
I'm a man now, Amanda – not a fool boy.
Sound of rain and thunder. EMILY
Have your feelings toward me so changed? Oh, this awful, ugly war!
BOB
Your brother wrote me a letter.
EMILY
Oh, but you must not believe my brother. He’d like to break my heart. He’d like to hound me to death – all because of the inheritance! Look at me, Emery – you know me. Put your arms around me, as you know you want to. I am as you left me, innocent and loving – loving only you. Yes, kiss me, Emery.
They kiss. The audience applauds. Backstage, the Footlighters join in the applause. BESS
Jeepers, Emily!
OTTO
She’s a natural!
HAMILTON
Bravo, Emily – I couldn’t believe my eyes!
BESS
You’re even better than Nancy! Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
66
CARSON
But where is Nancy?
JAMIE
Places! Scene Seven!
NED
Hold on! (Gives an ear-splitting whistle.) Where’s Nancy Drew?
Out of his hiding place, Cally emerges in his glittering striped and checkered costume. The audience gasps. Bushy opens a panel in the staircase and looks out on stage. MARGO
Look – a puppet! Like all the others – a dancing puppet!
Cally begins his puppet dance. TOM
Look – there it is! On stage!
TAMMI
The puppet – the big clown – we gotta get him!
Tom takes the skirt off the ballerina puppet and hands it to Tammi. TOM
Put this on and follow me. We’re gonna do it by brute force!
Tom and Tammi exit the loft dragging the puppets with them. In the hidden staircase, Bushy still struggles with the control box. BUSHY
(To Nancy) Did you jigger it?
NANCY
(Tears her gag off) They work by electricity, don’t they. Electromagnetic fields. That’s how you’ve been floating those puppets – isn’t it? Using the formulas in this old diary. What’s the matter? Lost your nerve?
BUSHY
(menacing) Did you do something to bust this control box?
NANCY
How could I? I’m trussed like a pig.
Tom and Tammi enter the hidden staircase, puppets in tow. TOM
What’s-a-matter?
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
67
BUSHY
Nancy Drew done it. We’re snafooed.
TOM
No, we're not. You follow us and snatch the clown. All right, Nancy Drew – forced march.
BUSHY
Right. We can’t leave her. She knows too much.
TOM
We need her – we snatch the clown, then we put her on ice. Don’t get your hopes up, Nancy Drew.
TAMMI
One last hurrah.
TOM
- and then you’re gonna take the dirt nap.
The three, holding the puppets in front of them, make their way across the ‘stage’ toward Cally, with Nancy in tow. Bushy grabs Cally and Cally screams. CALLY
Unhand me, gentlemen – I’ll make a ghost of him that lets me!
BUSHY
It’s not a puppet – it’s a loony tune!
NANCY
NED!!!
NED
It’s Nancy!
A slow-motion fight ensues. Bob tackles Tom. Nancy breaks free, and lunges for the proscenium arch. Bushy lunges after her, but Bob trips him as he grabs for her. She grabs a section of the arch which triggers a trap door. The real harlequin puppet, twice the size and twice as resplendent as Cally in his costume, ascends through the trap door. For a moment, the entire assembly is transfixed. Tom slips out of Bob’s grip. Nancy struggles out of the puppet, crosses back to the hidden staircase, reaches in and gets the control box, as Tom lunges for the harlequin puppet. Cally throws himself on Tom. Bushy and Tammi back away. Tom frees himself of Cally. As Tom, Tammi and Bushy are about to get away, Nancy moves the levers in the control box, and the witch and ballerina puppets rise into the air, dragging Tom and Bushy with them, and leaving Tammi surrounded on the ‘stage’ floor.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
68
TOM
Down! Lemme down!
BUSHY
Lemme go! Put me down from off the ground!
TAMMI
What did we ever do to you?
NANCY
I don’t know where to begin.
MCGINNIS
Well done, Nancy.
TOM
It hurts! It’s cutting off my circumnavigation.
TAMMI
Aw, shaddup. I’m beggin’ you now, Nancy Drew! I’m beggin’ you for mercy.
NANCY
Ready, Chief?
MCGINNIS
(produces handcuffs) Here’s your bracelets.
CALLY
I’ll do the honors.
TAMMI
It wasn’t the jewels that kept me here – I stayed... Bob Simpson! I stayed for no other reason than love!
CALLY
‚Oh, the venom clamors of a jealous woman...‛ A Comedy of Errors. ‚Frailly, thy name is woman – ‚
NANCY
Don’t push it, Cally. (To Tammi) But was it true love, Tammi?
TAMMI
Yes! True, true, love.
NANCY
If it was true love, Tammi, it would have changed you. You’d become kind, generous –
TAMMI
I will! Bob, I could be a whole new person.
NANCY
- and you’d care that the young man is already promised to another.
TAMMI
Emily? No! Never! I’ll scratch her eyes out! Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
69
NANCY
Really!
BUSHY
Let me down, I tell you.
TOM
There’s such a thing as human rights.
Nancy signals Bess and George to lower Tom. The Chief handcuffs him. MCGINNIS
You have the right to remain silent.
TAMMI
Have it your way, Nancy Drew – the jewels! I was here to steal the jewels!
Nancy crosses to the harlequin puppet. NANCY
You wanted the jewels (She touches a hidden lever, and a door opens in the puppet’s chest, revealing a heap of jewels. The crow gasps.) That’s not all. (She touches another lever, and another door reveals more jewels.) And I’d guess the missing diamonds might be found here. (Opens the chest of the ballerina, and takes out the casket of diamonds. Tammi sobs. Tom howls. Bushy hyperventilates.)
MCGINNIS
The paddy wagon’s outside.
TOM
You’ll regret this, Nancy Drew. You’re gonna have pain and suffrage!
Tom, Tammi and Bushy are lead off by the Footlighters. NANCY
(Indicating jewels) These are yours, Emily.
EMILY
They’re beautiful – but they’re not mine. I went onstage tonight and will again, if given half a chance. Uncle Van Pelt can keep his jewels.
CARSON
Hold on a second!
EMILY
It’s alright, Mr. Drew. You can’t help the terms of the will.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
70
CARSON
Oh, but in fact, I can. I took the will to a friend of mine this morning – a judge – and he agreed with me that the will is, with all due respect to the dead, in one provision unreasonable. You see, if, as Shakespeare observed, all the world’s a stage, were Emily prevented from going on stage –
NANCY
- she would be prevented from living at all.
CARSON
Accordingly, we find the will in that provision over-restrictive, unreasonable, and therefore null and void. You may keep your inheritance, dear Emily.
EMILY
How can I thank you, Mr. Drew?
CARSON
Thank me? My part was easy.
EMILY
Oh, Nancy – how thoughtless of me! Thank you!
NANCY
Don’t thank me. If it weren’t for Bob... Well, I guess we did it all together. And now I expect you can sleep at night.
MARGO
No more puppets!
HAMILTON
And no more ghosts!
CALLY
‚Goodnight, goodnight. Parting is such sweet sorry...‛
NANCY
Romeo and Juliet.
CALLY
Goodbye.
All exit except Emily, Bob, Nancy, George, Bess, Ned and Carson. CARSON
Ready to go home, Nancy?
NED
Sir –
CARSON
Ned can bring you.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
71
NANCY
Thanks, Dad. For everything. (She gives him a peck on the cheek. He exits. Bob and Emily wander upstage.) Psst! Bess! George!
After a whispered conference, Bess and George disappear into the ‘wings’. BOB
You were tremendous tonight, Emily. Not only the sweetest girl in the world, but also a great actress. I’m a luck guy
Nancy signals to the ‘wings’ and the sound of rain begins. BOB
(playing along) Listen, it’s raining.
Nancy signals to the ‘wings’ and a full moon rises over the ‘stage’. EMILY
And yet, there’s a full moon!
BOB
Yes, and by the next full moon, Emily, my love, we’ll be married! Unless you doubt that my heart is true –
EMILY
I’m sorry, Bob! No doubts at all!
They kiss. Nancy and Ned watch for a moment, then turn away to give them privacy. NED
They’re getting married.
NANCY
So they are.
NED
Well, we’re going steady, and –
NANCY
Well, Father mentioned a new case...
NED
Aw, Nancy.
Music rises as lights start to fade to blackout. NANCY
...an old lady in town with a strange whistling statue. And then there’s the unsolved mystery of the tolling bell. And also the message in the hollow oak; to say nothing of the clue of the broken locket, which I really must pursue.
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
72
Blackout. THE END
Nancy Drew: Girl Detective by Marisha Chamberlain
73
