HR Leadership Role in Managing Disruptive & Abusive Behavior KY/TN CUPA-HR Spring Conference April 11, 2013 Lynn Bynum
Agenda Defining what is “disruptive” or “abusive” behavior Role of Human Resources “consultants” Solving disruptive and abusive conflicts on campus
Disruptive/Abusive Behavior
How do you define “disruptive” behavior? How do you define “abusive” behavior?
Examples of Disruptive/Abusive Employees The Sherman Tank – behaves in abusive, abrupt, intimidating and contemptuous way leaving victims feeling defensive, overwhelmed and powerless The Sniper – uses teasing, innuendos and not-so-subtle insults to make other appear foolish
More Examples . . . The Exploder – throws a temper tantrum; loses control; may become physically violent. Victims feel intimidated and often frightened The Know-It-All – projects a sense of absolute certainty on all matters; the ultimate expert who leaves others feeling stupid, worthless or useless; dumps a profusion of facts and logical arguments on those who question her/him
Why HR? Often perceived to be impartial Supervisors and managers are at a loss in resolving conflict We are good listeners We represent a level of authority less threatening than a supervisor or manager
Challenges to Addressing Disruptive/ Abusive Behavior on Campus Perceived or real variances in power: Faculty vs. faculty Faculty vs. staff Staff vs. staff Staff vs. administrator Interpretations of freedom of speech Natural desire to avoid conflict Fear of retaliation
Coping with “Difficult” Conduct In the left column describe one to three situations in which you have had to respond to individual displays of emotional behavior. In the right column, describe your responses to the situations (behaviors, thoughts, feelings) SITUATION
RESPONSE
So, why are “they” so difficult? Emotional or physical depletion Frustration Emotional wounds and/or low self-esteem Emotional aggression (ego-centric; tantrums) Insatiable needs (status, attention, power, control) Rigidity – my way or no way Substance abuse or mental illness
What Should We Do as HR Leaders? Don’t let the disruptive behavior linger. Address it as soon as possible Get all the facts Confront in private; praise in public Be specific Focus on the behavior and Then focus on solutions
What If We Don’t Act? Perception of others is that you agree with the behavior The behavior continues or gets worse because the perception by the perpetrator and others is that it is okay You may be seen as someone who cannot handle it Because you don’t address it, you may be perceived as difficult too
Suggested Approaches Confused individual Listen attentively; keep your emotions in check Paraphrase what s/he is saying Reflect the feeling Clarify what the individual wants
Angry or hostile individual
Reflect feeling even more strongly – acknowledge where the individual is emotionally without feeling defensive or that you have to act immediately to calm him/her down Avoid explanations or excuses Keep the discussion on topic; stay calm
More Suggested Approaches Really angry and disruptive individual Intervene by stating the rules or policies State the limits of rules or policies (don’t apologize) Use direct confrontation by stating clearly why the behavior is disruptive or hostile, but don’t be drawn in to the emotion of the moment Be ready to call for back-up or have it close by
Moving Forward Based on today’s discussion, What would you do differently? What would you do the same? How would you create a “game plan” to move forward: For yourselves To share with others To implement in your office???
References “Thank You for Being a Pain: Dealing with Difficult People and Behaviors,” Gary Petiprin, Ph.D. “Dealing with People You Can’t Stand,” Rick Brinkman, Ph.D. & Rick Kirschner, Ph.D. “Dealing with Difficult People: A Training Program,” Martha Christiansen, Ph.D., Sam Cochran, Ph.D., Julie Corkery, Ph.D. “The Problem Customer: A Workshop for Personnel Who Meet the Public,” Wayne Anderson, Mark Rogers, & Barbara Bauer
