Getting Married in St George’s Church Pontesbury

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Congratulations! We are so pleased that you have chosen to get married at St George’s Church, Pontesbury. Your family and friends are probably celebrating the happy news and will want the very best for you as you plan for the great day and begin your married life together. Everyone in the Church is pleased for you too, and we will do everything we can to make sure the service goes really well. We want to make your wedding day one that you will remember for the rest of your life, not just the joy and celebration, but most of all for the time you spent in church, making your vows to each other in God’s loving presence. This booklet is designed to help you as you get ready for your wedding day and for married life. When you’ve read it, talk about the things which are most important to you with the Priest who will be preparing you for marriage.

A Marriage Prayer As you love each other Grow in the love of God As you give yourselves To each other God gives himself to you. As you share your Lives together God shares his life with you. As you grow in awareness Of each other Grow in awareness of God. Let his love encircle Your love Let his life fill your lives. Let him bind you as one together And one with him David Adam

You will have a lot to think about, and from time to time, questions will arise. Please feel free to telephone The Deanery Tuesday—Friday 01743 792221. Priest to marry us _______________ 2

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Going out:

Wedding march – Mendelssohn Arrival of Queen of Sheba– Handel Trumpet Voluntary– Jeremiah Clarke What a wonderful world Toccata & Fugue– Bach ‘ Walking on Sunshine’ Katrina and the waves All you need is love– Beatles

Readings The following scripture readings are suitable for weddings: Song of Solomon 2:10-13; 8:6,7 Romans 12:1,2,9-13 1 Corinthians 13 Ephesians 3:14-end Ephesians 4:1-6 Psalm 23

Philippians 4:4-9 Colossians 3:12-17 1 John 4:7-12 Matthew 7:12, 24-27 John 2:1-11 John 15:9-12

PHOTOGRAPHS

Other readings: The colour of my love—David Foster and Arthur Javor Let me not to the marriage—William Shakespeare Somewhere—Sir Edwin Arnold The art of a good marriage—Wilfred Peterson On Marriage—Kahil Gibran To be one with each other—George Eliot From ‘The Imitation of Christ—Thomas a Kempis There are many more to choose from. Please ask to see copies of any of these readings. You may like to choose someone to read for you. 18

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Hymns and Music Marriage A wedding is one of life’s great moments, a time of solemn commitment as well as good wishes, feasting and joy. St John tells us how Jesus shared in such as occasion at Cana, and gave there a sign of new beginnings as he turned water into wine. Marriage is intended by God to be a creative relationship, as his blessing enables husband and wife to love and support each other in good times and in bad, and to share in the care and upbringing of children. For Christians, marriage is also an invitation to share life together in the spirit of Jesus Christ. It is based upon a solemn, public and life-long covenant between a man and a woman, declared and celebrated in the presence of God and before witnesses. On their wedding day the bride and bridegroom face each other, make their promises and then receive God’s blessing. Witnesses express their support by their presence and their prayers, and their support doesn’t end on the wedding day. The couple will value continued encouragement in the days and years ahead of them. Love is patient, love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

(1 Corinthians 13) This extract is taken from Common Worship Pastoral Services

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Entry – Arrival Music to bring the bride in all her glory up the aisle, slow stately– but not too long. Eg: Trumpet Voluntary– Clarke Te Deum- Charpentier Arioso– Bach Bridal March– Wagner Music for Royal fireworks– Handel Or something modern and romantic… Theme from ‘Beauty and the beast’ Somewhere over the Rainbow Music from the film ‘The Piano’ … Make me feel your love– Adele Hymns — (usually two) One more step Give the Joy. (Sing Hosanna) Lord of all Hopefulness Bind us together Lord Morning has broken All things Bright and Beautiful Praise my Soul the King of heaven Love Divine, 2 tunes– different way of setting out. Jerusalem Make me a channel of your peace During the signing of the registers Music that you both like reminding you of special moments that brought you together and singers you both like. For example: Billy Joel– Just the way you are Andrea Bocelli– The Prayer Mandy Moore– Only hope Take That– Greatest Day Song bird Fields of Gold Love, it makes the world go round 17

May they nurture their family with devotion, See their children grow in body, mind and spirit and come at last to the end of their lives with hearts content and in joyful anticipation of heaven. Lord of life and love: All Hear our prayer. As our Saviour taught us, so we pray: Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us. Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For the kingdom, the power, and the glory are yours now and for ever. Amen. Second Hymn (suggestions on page 17)

The Legal aspects of a wedding Residence and Qualifying Connections The Church of England Marriage Measure 2008 has significantly relaxed the regulations governing marriage in its churches. To be married in any parish church either the bride or the groom has to have a qualifying connection with the parish, denoted by one or more of the following:

• • • • •

Registration of the Marriage

Parents, best man, bridesmaids, pageboys and the two chosen witnesses follow the priest and the couple to the high altar while the congregation sit and listen to some music whilst the registers are signed.

• •

The Dismissal

The minister says

Either the bride or the groom was baptised in the parish Either the bride or groom have been confirmed in a Church of England service and the confirmation is entered in a register belonging to a church in the parish A parent or grandparent was married in the parish by a Church of England service Either the bride or groom has had their usual place of residence in the parish for at least 6 months (whether or not you or your parents are still resident in the parish) Either the bride or groom’s parent has had their usual place of residence in the parish for at least 6 months during their child’s lifetime (whether or not you or your parents are still resident in the parish) Either the bride or groom has habitually attended public worship at Church of England services in the parish for at least 6 months Either the bride or groom’s parent has habitually attended public worship at Church of England services in the parish for at least 6 months during the child’s lifetime (whether or not they are still attending worship in the parish)

God the Holy Trinity make you strong in faith and love, defend you on every side, and guide you in truth and peace, and the blessing of God almighty, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, be among you and remain with you always. All Amen

Some people wishing to be married here are unable to fulfil any of the qualifications listed above. If this is your situation – please don’t worry! Come and talk to our Priest-in-Charge.

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The minister says to the couple

Special Licence

If either of you is not a UK national, it may be necessary to apply for an alternative Common Licence rather than be married after the calling of Banns – our Priest will help and advise you.

Wedding Blessing

Or it may be that you wish a civil ceremony with a few witnesses followed by a Church of England Marriage Blessing service that is similar to the wedding service. In this case, there will be no fee for signing of registers as this will already have been done.

Divorced bride or groom

This doesn’t have to be a problem but you will need to talk it through with our Priest-in-Charge. Some marriages regrettably do fail and the Church is here to support you as you come to terms with the breakdown in terms of repentance and forgiveness and in preparing to enter a new relationship. We believe that God is all loving and is very much a God of second chances who wants to bless light out of darkness.

Times of Weddings

Legally, marriages must be completed between 8am and 6pm. We like to arrange weddings between 10am and 4pm normally on Saturdays, but we can arrange weddings on other weekdays, although it is more difficult to guarantee organist, bell ringers etc. Lent (6 weeks before Easter) and Advent (4 weeks before Christmas) are penitential seasons in the Church’s year which makes them less appropriate times for weddings. However, this does not mean that you cannot have your wedding during theses times, but special arrangements would have to be made particularly regarding flowers as there will be no church flowers for Sunday services. 6

God the Father, God the Son, God the Holy Spirit, bless, preserve and keep you; the Lord mercifully grant you the riches of his grace, that you may please him both in body and soul, and, living together in faith and love, may receive the blessings of eternal life. All Amen. The Prayers

These or other suitable prayers are used

Faithful God, holy and eternal, source of life and spring of love, we thank you for bringing N and N to this day, and we pray for them. Lord of life and love: All Hear our prayer. May their marriage be life-giving and life-long, Enriched by your presence and strengthened by your grace; May they bring comfort and confidence to each other in faithfulness and trust. Lord of life and love: All Hear our prayer. May the hospitality of their home bring refreshment and joy to all around them; may their love overflow to neighbours in need and embrace those in distress. Lord of life and love: All Hear our prayer. May they discern in your word Order and purpose for their lives; and may the power of your Holy Spirit lead them in truth and defend them in adversity. Lord of life and love: All Hear our prayer. 15

The Proclamation

Cost — To date, there are two sets of charges:

The minister addresses the people

In the presence of God, and before this congregation, N and N have given their consent and made their marriage vows to each other. They have declared their marriage by the joining of hands and by the giving and receiving of rings. I therefore proclaim that they are husband and wife.

They minister joins their right hands together and says

Those whom God has joined together let no one put asunder. The Candle

The minister gives the husband and wife a lighted candle

Receive this lighted candle. This is to celebrate the joining of your lives into one. t is a symbol of the light of love that lives in you; and that lights your lives, and the lives of all those around you. Strive to keep that light alive; and may this candle be a reminder of this joyful day and of the promises you have made. The Blessing of the Marriage

The husband and wife kneel

(or an alternative)

All praise and blessing to you, God of love, for you have created courtship and marriage, joy and gladness, feasting and laughter, pleasure and delight. May your blessing come in full upon N and N. May they know your presence in their joys and in their sorrows. May they reach old age in the company of friends and come at last to your eternal kingdom, through Jesus Christ our Lord. All Amen. 14

1. Those set by the central church authorities as fees for conducting a wedding ceremony. These are set each January. 2. Fees set by the local church for ‘extras’ such as bells, facilities (inc. heating), organ, organist, verger etc.

Ushers

You will need to have at least 2 responsible ushers. They will be in church 45 mins before the service to give our Orders of Service and show people to their seats. They will also make sure that anything brought in for the wedding is removed when it is over.

Position

Pontesbury is on the A488 Shrewsbury-Bishop’s Castle road about 6 miles south of Shrewsbury, and about 4 miles from Rowton Castle – as the crow flies! (it’s a little further round the lanes). A word of warning, from experience we know the use of some SatNavs is unreliable from Rowton Castle!

Marriage Preparation A few months before your wedding you will be invited to attend one of our marriage preparation days on a Saturday. There will be several other couples who are also getting married and you will be able to meet Jack our organist, Sue, who will advise you about flowers, Mary, our Verger and several other people. You will also be able to meet the Priest conducting your wedding.

Sunday Services at St George’s Church You are invited to join us for our main act of worship the 10.30am Eucharist on Sundays. This is the service where you will hear your banns read. We guarantee you a warm welcome and refreshments afterwards where you can meet the people who will be helping you to organise your wedding. Every 3rd Sunday it is All-Age (non Eucharistic). 7

The Giving of Rings

Flowers

At St George’s we have a rota of people who arrange flowers in church each week. One arrangement is placed:• In front of the pillar in the right hand corner of the foyer • By the Pulpit • By the altar If you would like us to arrange flowers for your wedding, there will be a charge. You can supplement the arrangements listed above with other displays, garlands and pew ends which you will need to organise yourselves. Alternatively, you may wish to have a florist to provide the flowers for your wedding. If you do this, the flowers in the 3 positions listed above would need to stay in place for Sunday. All other flowers would need to be removed. There is a form to complete for your requirements.

Wedding Bells

You may request for the bells to be rung after your wedding. Please let us know this at your first interview.

Photographs/Video

We encourage you to have a professional photographer who will be shown by the priest where to be positioned to obtain the best pictures. If you are having a video of the service, you will need to complete the Copyright Form and there is an additional fee. We encourage you to use bio-degradable confetti, paper, rice or petals. NO METALLIC STRIPS PLEASE. Jack Cornall Organist: Sue Picken Flowers: Revd Margaret Jones: Revd Shirley Small: Revd Caroline Wright:

All

Heavenly Father, by your blessing, let these rings be to N and N a symbol of unending love and faithfulness, to remind them of the vow and covenant which they have made this day through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

The bridegroom places the ring on the fourth finger of the bride’s left hand and, holding it there, says N, I give you this ring

as a sign of our marriage. With my body I honour you, all that I am I give to you, and all that I have I share with you, within the love of God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

They loose hands and the bride places a ring on the fourth finger of the bridegroom’s left hand and, holding it there, says N, I give you this ring

Confetti

Useful contacts:

The minister receives the rings, and says

01743 01743 01743 01743 01743 8

271504 790551 792221 791885 718790

as a sign of our marriage. With my body I honour you, all that I am I give to you, and all that I have I share with you, within the love of God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

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The Marriage Vows

The couple stand before the minister who introduces the vows N and N, I now invite you to join hands and make your vows, in the presence of God and his people. The bride and bridegroom face each other. The bridegroom takes the bride’s right hand in his, and says I, N, take you, N, to be my wife, to have and to hold from this day forward; for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part; according to God’s holy law. In the presence of God I make this vow.

They loose hands. The bride takes the bridegroom’s right hand in hers, and says I, N, take you, N, to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward; for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part; according to God’s holy law. In the presence of God I make this vow. 12

The Wedding Service The Welcome We meet in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.

The minister welcomes the people This sentence may be used

God is love, and those who live in love live in God and God lives in them. 1 John 4.16

Opening Prayer God of wonder and of joy: grace comes from you, and you alone are the source of life and love. Without you, we cannot please you; without your love, our deeds are worth nothing. Send your Holy Spirit, and pour into our hearts that most excellent gift of love, that we may worship you now with thankful hearts and serve you always with willing minds; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. First Hymn (there are suggestions on page 17) The Preface We have come together in the presence of God, to witness the marriage of N and N, to ask his blessing on them, and to share in their joy. Our Lord Jesus Christ was himself a guest at a wedding in Cana of Galilee, and through his Spirit he is with us now. The Bible teaches us that marriage is a gift of God in creation and a means of his grace, a holy mystery in which man and woman become one flesh. It is God’s purpose that, as husband and wife give themselves to each other in love throughout their lives, they shall be united in that love as Christ is united with his Church. 9

Marriage is given, that husband and wife may comfort and help each other, living faithfully together in need and in plenty, in sorrow and in joy. It is given, that with delight and tenderness they may know each other in love, and, through the joy of their bodily union, may strengthen the union of their hearts and lives. It is given as the foundation of family life in which children may be born and nurtured in accordance with God’s will, to his praise and glory.

The minister says to the bridegroom N, will you take N to be your wife?

In marriage husband and wife belong to one another, and they begin a new life together in the community. It is a way of life that all should honour; and it must not be undertaken carelessly, lightly, or selfishly, but reverently, responsibly, and after serious thought.

Will you love him, comfort him, honour and protect him, and, forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?

This is the way of life, created and hallowed by God, that N and N are now to begin. They will each give their consent to the other; they will join hands and exchange solemn vows, and in token of this they will [each] give and receive a ring. Therefore, on this their wedding day we pray with them, that, strengthened and guided by God, they may fulfil his purpose for the whole of their earthly life together. The Declarations

The minister says to the congregation

First, I am required to ask anyone present who knows a reason why these persons may not lawfully marry, to declare it now.

The minister says to the couple

The vows you are about to take are to be made in the presence of God, who is judge of all and knows all the secrets of our hearts; therefore if either of you knows a reason why you may not lawfully marry, you must declare it now.

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Will you love her, comfort her, honour and protect her, and, forsaking all others, be faithful to her as long as you both shall live?

He answers

I will.

The minister says to the bride N will you take N to be your husband?

She answers

I will.

The minister says to the congregation Will you, the families and friends of N and N, support and uphold them in their marriage now and in the years to come? All We will.

The Collect Prayer

The minister invites the people to pray

God our Father, from the beginning, you have blessed creation with abundant life. Pour out your blessings upon N and N, that they may be joined in mutual love and companionship, in holiness and commitment to each other. We ask this through our Lord Jesus Christ your Son, who is alive and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen. The Readings

One must be a biblical passage. You may also choose another reading or poem. There are suggestions on page 18. Address 11