AUDITION PACKET WEDNESDAY ADDAMS

SCENE 2 (MORTICIA'S BOUDOIR) (Revealing GOMEZ, fencing with LURCH, who holds his foil absolutely still while GOMEZ swipes at it extravagantly.) GOMEZ Fight sir, fight like a man! Feel the kiss of my Spanish steel! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Foiled again! (GOMEZ strikes LURCH's sword down. LURCH pokes GOMEZ with it.) Oww! Damn your lightning reflexes! (GOMEZ retains his sword. MORTICIA enters with a bouquet of yellow flowers.) MORTICIA Gomez, look. GOMEZ Ugh! Flowers! Who would send something so tasteless? MORTICIA (reads the card) "The most precious gift there is, More goody-licious than gold, Is that blessing we call friendship, Whether new or very old." GOMEZ "Goody-licious?" Who talks like this? (MORTICIA removes the flowers from the stems,During--) MORTICIA The Beinekes. Wednesday's friend Lucas and his parents. They're coming for dinner tonight. GOMEZ Lucas?

8

MORTICIA Yes. GOMEZ But Lucas is a boy's name. MORTICIA Yes. GOMEZ Wednesday has a friend who's a boy? (They both look at Lurch. Finally--) MORTICIA It's nothing, darling. Puppy love. (hands Lurch the stems) Put these in water. (WEDNESDAY enters, carrying her crossbow and a goose with an arrow sticking out of it.) WEDNESDAY Mom, Dad, I shot dinner. MORTICIA (taking it) Oh, Wednesday, that's lovely. Wherever did you find it? WEDNESDAY Petting zoo. MORTICIA Thank you, dear. Come, Lurch - we'll whip up something really special. And this time, we'll actually cook it. (shares a laugh with Lurch) Oh, Gomez - guests for dinner! Fresh meat! (They exit. WEDNESDAY looks nervously after them.) WEDNESDAY Daddy, I have something very important to tell you. GOMEZ What? 9

WEDNESDAY Can you keep a secret? (WEDNESDAY produces a ring from around her neck.) GOMEZ Of course. WEDNESDAY Look. GOMEZ If I didn't know any better I'd say that looked like an engagement ring. (she just looks at him) What are you saying? WEDNESDAY Oh daddy, Lucas wants to marry me! GOMEZ What?! WEDNESDAY Lucas Beineke loves me and he wants to marry me. GOMEZ Do you want to marry him? WEDNESDAY Yes. I think so. GOMEZ You think so? WEDNESDAY Well, I've never even met his parents, and he's never met mine, and - I just need to be sure. GOMEZ That he's the one? WEDNESDAY That the families can get along. I mean, he has to know what he's getting into.

10

GOMEZ What are you saying? WEDNESDAY I'm saying we're who we are, and they're from Ohio. GOMEZ (slicing the air with his sword) Ohio? A swing state! WEDNESDAY That's what I mean. GOMEZ You're right, this is important. Let's go tell your mother. WEDNESDAY No. GOMEZ No? But we have to tell your mother – WEDNESDAY Daddy, please! She'll ask a lot of embarrassing questions and wreck the whole thing. GOMEZ You don't want me to tell your mother you're getting married? WEDNESDAY After dinner and we're all friends, then we'll tell her. GOMEZ But I've never kept anything from your mother. WEDNESDAY (getting desperate) Daddy, please! GOMEZ But— WEDNESDAY If you love me.

11

SCENE 6 (SOMEWHERE ELSE IN THE HOUSE) (WEDNESDAY enters, pursued by LUCAS.) LUCAS You realize they're gonna freak when we tell them? WEDNESDAY My father won't. LUCAS Why not? WEDNESDAY I already told him. LUCAS What? You told your father? Your father, with the sword? You told him we were getting married, just like that? WEDNESDAY He's totally cool with it. Mostly. LUCAS I thought we were gonna tell them all together! WEDNESDAY We need his help. You don't know my mother. She could really screw it up. LUCAS I'm not marrying your mother. WEDNESDAY I know. Look - it might seem old fashioned, but I want their blessing. LUCAS You're right, it is old fashioned. WEDNESDAY Lucas, do you love me? LUCAS Of course. 43

WEDNESDAY Then leave it to me. It's all going according to plan. LUCAS What plan? There's no plan! WEDNESDAY That's the plan. Improvise. Keep 'em guessing. LUCAS You're really crazy. WEDNESDAY You say that like it's a bad thing. It's just a simple dinner. What could go wrong? Come on. (She leads him off. FESTER and ANCESTORS appear again. The kids' love has won over the ANCESTORS.) FESTER Aww. #8A BUT LOVE REPRISE 2 BE PATIENT AND SOON THE WAY WILL BE CLEAR FOCUS YOUR FEAR AND TROUBLES ALL WILL DISAPPEAR LET'S NOT TALK ABOUT ANYTHING OLD ANCESTORS PLEASE DON'T LEAVE US OUT IN THE COLD FESTER LET'S NOT TALK ABOUT ANYTHING ELSE BUT LOVE ANCESTORS BUT LOVE FESTER BUT LOVE

44

ACT TWO SCENE 1 (OUTSIDE THE HOUSE) #15 OPENING ACT II (TASSEL and IT have a flirtation and run off. FESTER opens the curtain and closes the gate. WEDNESDAY enters, with suitcase and crossbow, pursued by LUCAS. The ANCESTORS observe this.) [MUSIC STOPS] LUCAS Wait, wait! We have to talk this over for a minute. WEDNESDAY Talk what over? LUCAS We can't just run away and get married. You said it was important that everyone got along. WEDNESDAY And you said it didn't matter! LUCAS Yeah, but they wanna kill each other! You want that hanging over our heads? WEDNESDAY Boy, you sound just like your father. The root doesn't fall far from the tree, does it? LUCAS What? WEDNESDAY Forget it. LUCAS The apple. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. WEDNESDAY God, you're annoying. 76

LUCAS You know what I think? You don't really wanna get married. You just said that to stick it to your mother. WEDNESDAY Don't psychoanalyze me, Lucas. It's a deep dark hole and you don't wanna go there. Come on. LUCAS What'll we do for money? WEDNESDAY Stop being so scared of everything. ANCESTORS Yeah. LUCAS Right, like you're not scared. WEDNESDAY I eat scared for breakfast, honey. ANCESTORS Yeah. LUCAS Let's go back in the house and make some rational decisions. ANCESTORS No. WEDNESDAY I don't want rational decisions! I want dangerous, impulsive, crazy decisions! ANCESTORS Yeah. WEDNESDAY Are you coming or not? LUCAS Look - I - I can't run away like this. It's too crazy. I'm sorry.

77

WEDNESDAY Not as sorry as you're gonna be when you wake up and you're forty-six and working for your father! (ANCESTORS gesture to respond, but WEDNESDAY cuts them off. She storms away. LUCAS calls after her.) LUCAS I can be impulsive! I just need to think about it first! [MUSIC IN] (LUCAS, all indecision, exits back to the house. FESTER enters.) ANCESTORS AH, AH, AH, AH, AH! FESTER There you are: Secrets exposed. Marriages threatened. Delicious anarchy. What happens now? Can this be repaired? Or do you all leave in an hour feeling vaguely depressed? Let's find out, shall we? (FESTER parts the gates, revealing--)

78

WEDNESDAY 3

SCENE FIVE: UNDER THE ADDAMS FAMILY TREE GOMEZ sits on the swing. He listens to the sounds of the city and park - culminating in a scream and two gunshots, which relaxes him. WEDNESDAY crosses furiously, with suitcase and crossbow. GOMEZ Wednesday! WEDNESDAY Don't even! GOMEZ Where do you think you're going, young lady? WEDNESDAY Away. GOMEZ Elopement?? WEDNESDAY Daddy, would you just please let me GOMEZ No! This is what comes from keeping secrets! If the two of you wanted to get married, you should've WEDNESDAY (cutting him off) There's not gonna be any marriage! GOMEZ No? Why? WEDNESDAY He bailed! What?

GOMEZ A breach of promise?

An outrage!

WEDNESDAY He thought running away was a bad idea.

GOMEZ On the other hand, he does have a point. WEDNESDAY I hate him! GOMEZ Well, it's a beginning. Something to build on. WEDNESDAY He says he can't live without me, and then he lets me go. I love him. Why doesn't he love me? GOMEZ You just said you hated him.

Which is it?

WEDNESDAY Both. GOMEZ Now you've got it.

06 PULLED [Rev. 1/3/12]

Music and Lyrics by ANDREW LIPPA

WEDNESDAY: "This dinner has to go OK. PUGSLEY: "It will if you let me blow up this Lucas guy!" WEDNESDAY: “Oh, Pugsley - ever since I met him, I wanna laugh and cry and everything seems right and wrong at the same time and then sometimes I just want to rip his flesh..." [MUSIC] (cont.) "...off and eat him up until there's nothing left.”

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j ‰ j ? Œ ‰ ‰ j œ n œ œ b œ œ & œ œ œ œ œ- œ. . œ b œœ œ > > > Œ

œ

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‰ œj ‰ œj œ œ > b >œ

spark,

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if they keep in - sis

di - rec - tion!

n œœœ œ œœœ œ œœœ œ œœœ œ Ó

>œ œœ œ J ‰

œ œ Œ ‰ œj œ œ œ

78

j Œ ‰ œœ Ó œ >

œ œ œ œ œ œ œ œ ev' - ry

b & b bbbb

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di - rec - tion,

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in

77

Œ

84

Œ

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I should >œ œœ œ J ‰ œ œ œ œ j sub. P œ ‰ œœ œ œ >

œ œ œ œ œ œ œ œ has a

bite

85

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stay in the

‰

œ n œœœ >

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dark,

not

o - bey

œœ œ œ œ œ œ œœ œ œœ œ œœ œ cresc. poco a poco

j ‰ Œ œ œ

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no ped.

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bet - ter far

b œœœ œ œœœ œ œœœ œœœ œœœœ Ó

82

than his

Œ. Œ.

bark.

œ œ And you

j œœ œœ n œœ œœ j j nœ œ œ . nœ œ œ .

œœœ œœœ

–8–

Piano/Vocal 86

b b b b œ œ3 œ ˙ b & b

87

œŒ œ œ

bet I'll bite, too.

b & b b b b b ˙˙˙ f ? bbb bbb œ. œ.

˙˙ ˙

con ped.

98

b & b bbbb œ bb & b b bb

œ

Do what's

˙ n ˙˙˙

˙˙ ˙˙

˙.

99

œ œ œ

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3 œ œ œ ˙

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˙˙ ˙

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j œ œ œ œ œ œ

w

œŒ

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n ˙˙˙˙

˙˙˙ ˙

rit.

w

> > œœœœ œœœœ J‰ J‰

>œ >œ œœ œœ œ œœ J‰ J‰

‰ œj Ó œ >

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90

!

^œ ^ œ œ œ œœ œ œœ œœ œ 3

b ˙˙˙˙

˙ ˙

˙˙˙ ˙

˙

Œ œ

101

w

U w www æ

di -

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j œ œ œ œ œ œ bœ Œ œ œ œ œ œ œ bœ >

œ. œ.

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rit.

91

pulled in a new

j œ. œ œ œ œ. œ œ œ

100

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Œ

89

tru - ly tab - oo,

j j œ œ œ œ. œ œ œ œ œ œ œ. œ œ œ

rec - tion.

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88

06. Pulled [Rev. 1/3/12]

102

!

! !

Œ Ó

œ ß ? œ Œ Ó œ fl

19 CRAZIER THAN YOU [Rev. 1/14/12]

Music and Lyrics by ANDREW LIPPA LUCAS: "Where'd you--" WEDNESDAY: “Put this apple on your head and go stand against the tree.” LUCAS: “Wait - you're gonna--?” WEDNESDAY: “Uh-huh.” LUCAS: “You're crazy.” WEDNESDAY: “And you're not crazy enough. That's the problem.” [GO ON]

LUCAS: “No, but see--the lover always comes back. Ulysses. Tristan. Romeo.” WEDNESDAY: "Listen, I'm home-schooled. What's your point?" LUCAS: "I'd rather die than live without you." WEDNESDAY: “Ok. Prove it!” LUCAS: "What." WENDESDAY: "Prove it." [MUSIC] "Here."

Bright 4

## 4 1 & 4

q

»118

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2 WEDNESDAY:

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# & # 44

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ful.

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simile

6

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Life,

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Œ

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we

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hope -

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were one.

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was

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than per - fect

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fin'

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" œ " œ " " " œr ‰ œ œ œ œ nœ !

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Piano/Vocal

& &

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9

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12

are

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well

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and

with

my

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15

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love

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r " œœœ " œœœ " œœœ " œœ " œœ " œœ ‰ œ œ œ

you with

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death

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˙

in

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now

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14

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10

19. Crazier Than You TOUR [1/14/12]

œœ

j œ

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knife.

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17

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˙.

But can I

œ œ " " œ " " œ " œ b œœ œ œœ œ œœ œ œœ œœ œœœ n˙

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–3–

Piano/Vocal

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live

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your

tor

b &b œ

b

? bb

22

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than

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cra - zi - er

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you!

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Œ

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now

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just

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the o

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ong.

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ver - view.

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25

That's

than

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j œ œ

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21

I'm

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19

wife?

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Œ

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b 24œ b &

your

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b Œ f ? bb œ

and

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&b

&b

men - tor

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cra - zi - er

b &b

-

˙ w

20

œ œ œ

œ œ œ

19. Crazier Than You TOUR [1/14/12]

So,

œœ œ

" j œ.

œœ œœ œ œ œ

‰ œ œ

–4–

Piano/Vocal

b &b &b

b

? bb

28

&

26

œ œ bœ

œ œ get on

board

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sim

-

# V # œ

‰.

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ply

move

‰

‰

29

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not

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o

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‰

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o

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that of

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30

tru - ly love you.

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‰.

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I'm

r œ œ

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!

32

nœ

Œ

But

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r œ œœ œ " œœ " œœ " œœ " œ " œœ ‰ œ œ nœ Œ " œ œ œ œ

Œ

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!

33

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de - ranged.

r r œ œœ œ " œœ " œœ " œœ " œ " œœ ‰ œ œœ œ " œœ " œœ " œœ " œ " œœ ‰ œ œ œ nœ œ nœ

you.

"

ong.

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im - pul - sive.

# r & # œ œœ n œœ " œœ " œœ " œœ " œœ " œœ ‰ œ ? ##

I

Œ

œœ.

# # 31‰ & œ œ œ nœ œ œ œ œ œ œ . Œ

lo

œ nœ œ œ œ œ œ œ œ œ .

And yet

r‰ " " " " " œ œ œ œ œ œ œ œ & œ œ œ œ œ œ œ nœ P ? ## Œ Ó " œ œ œ œ

# V # œ

-

WEDNESDAY:

r œ œ

I'd ne - ver ask

a

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27

b œœ œœ œœ œœ œ œ œ œ r r œ " ‰. œ ‰ #œ œ œ œ

! LUCAS:

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b œœœ ...

##

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or

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19. Crazier Than You TOUR [1/14/12]

œœ. œ

Ó

ment

r œ œœ œ " œœ " œœ " œœ " œ " œœ ‰ œ œ nœ Œ " œ œ œ œ

Œ

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